Meri age 27 hay aur mera masla batanay sey pehlay mai thora apna childhood k baary mein
batana chahongi. Mujhay bachpan mein kaafi maar parti thi apnay parents sey
dono hi ghussay k both taiz thy.maar tou subko hi parti hay laikn mery maa baap
humiliate kertay thy mujhay apna aap kabhi important nahi laga mujh mein
bachpan sey ghussa both ziada hay zera si baat ko izzat ka masla bana laity thi
waqt k saath saath mujh mein anxiety barhti gayee itni k meri normal life
disturb hogaye aur mujhay ghar baithna para start mein samajh nahi aati thi k
kia masla hay lagta tha mar jaongi aur dar both ziada lagta tha unknown fear rehta
tha panic attacks bhi aatay thay energy body mein lagta tha khatam hogaye hy
baad mein samajh aaya k yh doctors k mutabiq Generalized Anxiety thi.Aakhir aik
Doctor nay mujhay Inderal aur tranxene de ab mai theek houn pehlay sey
medicines bhi quit ker dein hain kabhi kabhi neend ki goli kha leti houn jub
dimagh soch soch ker both thaka hua ho.kiuk mujhay neend aa bhi rahi ho tou
aankh lagnay mein kaafi time lag jaata hay.mai apnay daant chabati rehti houn.
Currently mera masla yeh hay k mai khushi ko theek terha sey
feel nahi ker paati.mera nikkah ho chukka hay mai khush bhi both houn laikn
meri rangat kharab hay mai her waqt saans rokay sochti rehti hou apni looks k
baarey mein bhi both conscious houn let me tell u k mai jub bhi kahi jaati houn
Allah ka both shukar hay k meri her koi tareef kerta hay laikn mujh mein
self-confidence nahi hay, mai imagine kerti rehti houn k mai shadi k baad apnay
husband aur in-laws k saamna kaisey baat karoungi,kaisey khaongi,uthna baithna
sub aur yeh k unko jald hi pata chal jaiga k mujh mein tou self-respect naam ki
koi chez hi nahi hy. Mery husband kaafi achay insaan hain lakn masla yeh hay k
mai aksar sochti houn k future mein meray husband mujhay humiliate
karengay,haath uthaingy aur yeh k mai berdasht ker lounge kiuk mai yeh deserve
kerti houn,mujh mein itni self pity hay. aik aur baat mai jub apny cousins
waghaira k saath hoti hou tou pata nahi may nay note kia hay k sub sey ziada
bolti hou jaisey subko khush kernay ki koshish mein lagi rehti hou,koi zera
criticize keray tou explanations deti hou.meray parents ka rawayya ab pehlay
sey kaafi behtar hy laikn mera ji chahta hy k mai cheekh cheekh ker unko bataon
k unho ny mera kitna nuqsan kia hy k aaj mery paas her chez hy khush honay k
lyey laikn mai khushi feel nahi ker sakti.mai nay self-help ki kaafi koshish ki
hy magar mai thak gayee hou nahi guzaar sakti iss terha zindagi jub tak mai
theek houngi tab tak yeh khoobsorat waqt guzar chukka hoga ,mai nay internet
per self-confidennce aur how to get rid of ego,anxiety,positive thinking ,how
to live in the present moment yeh sub both read kia laikn mai thak gayee apnay
nafsiat k konsay konsay angle ko theek keroun samjh nahi aati,meri Health
isslye bhi both kharab hy k mai present moment mein nahi rehti her waqt saans
rokay sochti rehti hu future k baary mein k
shadi k bad sub sy kaisy baat keroungi relax,calm aur confident hoker.Please
Help Me Out. Regards.
ma nay ap kee lambi sari problems read kee ha...ap kee problem ka solution yeah ha kay ap EARLY morning walk keray....subah jaldi uth ker fajar kee namaz ada keray...aur apnay ap koo sara day kissi activity may masroof rekhay...ap kay andar bohat confidence ain ga
Gul rokh chund tips apko data hon ap enko zen nusheen kur lain or en pur amal kurin,
Humasha acha dress pheny nufees Jub ap acha dress zab-a-tun kurin gahi tu ap achi bhe lugho ghi or khoobsrat bhe lugo ghi essy Ensan meah confidence ata hy jub woh achy or nufees dress meah ota hy ,
Apni skin care k leyeh yeh hay kay achi nend kurin or bujay sochny k achi books purin ya TV pur achy programs dakhain. akali alag thulag ho kur mut batihain
Khana achi tura khain or pani ziyada peya kurin
Jo Log chery pur 12 bujay rukhty hen onka chera baronak rehta hy or jo log achy nurm andaz meah bat kurty hen or smile kurty hen onka chera tur o taza rehta hy
Shadi kay bhad rishto ki ehmiyat or apni zimadariyan or Huqooq o furayz achi tura say nibhain or apny shohar ko sumajny ki koshish kurin sub thek ho jay gah, Confidence kay leyeh apni shukhsiyat ko por kushish bunain apny aap sy peyar kurin or khod ko sunwara kurin . jub apni care ni kurin gahi apny ap ko sunwary gy ni acha dress ni pheny gahy esy he life bojal lugy ghi. Namaz purha kurin sub k leyeh acha sochain dil meah Hasad boghuz ko kubi na anay dain, Insha Allah sub thek ho jay gah ,
Assalam-o-Alaikom! Aapka bht bht Shukria itni lengthy post parhi aur jawab dia, aapny waqae mein sahih pin point ke hy mere problem mai apni dressing ka ghar pr khayal nahin rakhti haan kahin jaana ho tou tayyar hoti houn tub achha feel hota hay So Confidence k lyey aapny jo bataya mai samajh gayee aur mai amal bhi karoungi InshAllah....laikn mujh mein jo self pity hy yh asaani sy nahin jaati khud sy piar kerna mushkil aur ajeeb sa lagta hy kia karon? hassad shukar hy nahi hy haan kurhti ziada hon choti bari her baat pay.
Group: Members Joined: 04th Mar, 2011 Topic: 11 Post: 1222 Age:
33
Posted on:6th Dec 2012, 4:10pm
GullRukh:
Walaikum Salam.
Very nice reply by Dr.Qasim.
GullRukh, aap ki post lambi zaroor thee, magar aap na bohot accha tareeqa say apni problem ko articulate kia hai, jis say aap ki problem ko samajhna mein aasani hoi.
Bachon ko young age mein daantna, maarna sa unki personality ki development mein bohot gaps aa jaatay hain, jo keh aagay chal kar lack of self esteem, low self confidence, self pity, anger, unexplained aches and pains, anxiety, aur mood swings ki shakal mein saamna aatay hain.
Iski basic wajah yeh hai keh bachon ki emotional growth ka lia maan baap kaa piyar aur validation bohot important hoti hai, aur agar unfortunately, yeh piyar, acceptance, aur validation nah mila to bachay ka andar self doubt create ho jaata hai, aur yeh saari cheezain jo aap na batai hain, develop hona lagtee hain.
Maan baap ki beja sakhti aur maar peet ki wajah say bacha apna self confidence loose kar daita hain, kionkeh unko apna parents say har waqt yehi message mil raha hota hai keh they are good for nothing. Issi lack of self confidence ki wajah say bachay jab zara barray hota hain, aur apna aap ko doosron say compare karna start kartay hain, to apna lack of self confidence ki wajah say hamesha khud ko doosron say inferior samajhna lagta hain. Iss inferiority complex ki wajah say woh apni positive qualities ko sahih say pehchaan nahin paatay, aur barray ho kar bhee khud ko doosron say inferior hi samajhta hain. Iska saath saath apna lack of self confidence ki wajah say unko life ki choti choti problems bhee bohot barri nazar aana lagtee hain, aur phir yeh darr keh woh life ki mushkilaat ko handle nahin kar sakain gaa, yeh daar ahista ahista anxiety ki shakal ikhtiaar kar laita hai, aur iss anxiety ki wajah say jab unki quality of life effected hona lagtee hai, tou next problem jo develop hoti hai woh depression hoti hai.
Aap na bataya keh doctors na aap ko GAD ( Generalized Anxiety Disorder) bataya, magar jo kuch aap bata rahee hain, uska basis par mera yeh khayal hai keh anxiety kaa saath saath aap ko aik aur problem bhee hai, aur woh hai depression. Ho sakta hai mera yeh khayal ghalat ho, issi lia clarify karna kay liaa aap say kuch questions karna chahta hoon...
1) Generally, aap ka mood 1-10 scale par kahan hota hai ( agar 1 very very sad ho, aur 10 very happy)? Genrally aap apna mood ko kis number par rakhain gee?
2) Aap ki concentration kaisee hai? Kia koi book waghira parrhta hoa yaa koi aur zehni kaam karta hoa zehan idhar udhar bhatakta hai? yaa koi important decisions laina mein mushkil feel hoti hai?
3) Mood swings, aur anger problems waghira?
4) Energy level generally low rehta hai? Appetite ( bhook) effected hoi hai?
5) Sleep problems aap na already mention kar dia.
6) Tearfulness, crying episodes waghira?
7) Feelings of hopelessness about the furure?
8) Feelings of helplessness and worthlessness?
9) Low self esteem, jo depression mein bohot common hai, aap na already mention kar dia.
10) Depression mein generally 3 tarah ki negative thoughts bohot common hain: apni abilities kaa baaray mein hopeless feel karna, apna ird gird ka logon kaa baaray mein negative andaza lagana keh woh hamain mistreat karain gay, aur feeling hopeless about our future. Aap ko inn mein say kon si thoughts ziada hain?
11) Kabhee intihai frustration mein thoughts of death to nahin aatay?
12) Kia hobbies aur aisee activities jo aap ko pehla pasand theen, kia unn mein aap ka interest ab bhee waisa hee hai yaa kuch kam hoa hai?
Aap na jo symptoms bataye keh aap dartee hain keh apna inlaws waghaira ko kaisa face karain gee, etc, yeh lack of self esteem aur depression ka classical symptoms hain.
Unfortunately, dunya ka most cultures mein, khas tor par eastern cultures mein depression/anxiety ko kamzori ki alamat samjha jaata hai, aur unfortunately, issi wajah say bohot say depressed/anxious log, proper professional help bhee nahin laita, keh log kia kahain gay. Aap na mashallah himmat sa kaam lai kar apni anxiety ka treatment karwaya, jiska lia waqai aap ki tareef karni chahye. Magar abhee bhee aap ka basic issues fully address nahin hoa hain, jiski wajah say aap ko yeh saara symptoms ho raha hain.
Aap apna past to nahin change kar sakteen, magar apna past ki wajah say apna future ko effect nah hona dain. You have the power to change your future, all you have to do is to change the way you think. Depression aur anxiety agar mild degree ki ho to positive thinking sa kaafi improvement hoti hai. Magar agar depression aur anxiety moderate to severe degree ki ho,tou phir brain ka neurotransmitters ( chemicals) change hona lagtay hain, phir uss waqt medications laina zaroori ho jaata hai, takeh unn chemicals ko phir say normal kia jaa sakay. Modern medications anxiety aur depression ka treatment ka lia bohot effective hoti hain, with very few side effects. Aur sab say acchhee baat yeh keh anxiety aur depression treat karna ka lia do alag alag medications ki zaroorat nahin hoti, balkeh aik medication hee donon problems ko treat kartee hai. I will explain to you more later, magar abhee aap sa jo questions poocha, unka answer dai dain.
Daanton ka chabana, yaa grinding of teeth, also called Bruxism, is a very common symptom of anxiety.
Aapka both Shukria aapnay post read ki aur reply dia aur woh
sub jo mai mention nahi kr saki aapnay kr dya.i’l try to keep my replies
precise.
1.mera mood 1-10 scale pr 5 pay hota hy,magar mai ziada tar
irritate both hoti hon.
2.mai book ya novel read krti hon tou concentrate krnay mein
muskil hoti hy aik simple c line ko kabhi baar baar parhna prta hy....decision
making powr achi nahi,mai kaafi confused rehti houn mujhay lagat hy her kaam
mein mujhy ghar walo aur doosry logo ki acceptance aur approval chahye hota hy
aisa lagta hy k meri apni soch aur like dislikes nahi meri jaga meray parents
kay dimagh sey sochnay ki koshish kerti hon k unko kia achha ya bura lagta hy
as a result na khud khush rehti hon na parents ko khush rakh paati hon.
3.mood swings kaafi hain suppose aaj mera mood achha nahi
kal tak soch soch kr thak jaoungi to phir aik dam sy extremely excited feel
krnay lagti hon.....aur ghussa both jaldi aata hy ziada tar aisa hota hy k koi
ghar mei aisi bat kr day jisy mujhy ignore kr dena chahye mery andar aik dam sy
be-tahasha ghussa aa jata hy aur phir kurhti hon baith kr.
4.Energy level aisa hota hy k subah jaagti hon tou b fresh
nahi hoti aur susti b rehti hy laikn mai ziada clear nahi kuk mai tou iss terha
kaafi arsay sy hon,waisy generally mujhy apni body pay yaqeen nahi hota k mai
ziada physical work kr sakoungi aur agar krti hon tou energy b itni nahi hoti jaldi
thak jati hon........appetite theek hy mujhay theek thaak bhook lagti hy balk
anxiety sy pehlay mai itna nahi khati thi ab pait bhar kr khaati hon haan yeh
alag baat k mindless eating ziada hoti hy.Ajeeb c baat hy mujhy lagta hy mai
apni bhook sy ziada apny andar kisi aur chez ko satisfy krnay k lyey ziada
khaati hon.
5.Yes.i hv difficulty falling asleep chahy kitni neend aur
thakan ho.aajkal to khud sy fight krti rehti hon k khud ko theek krna hy ya
mostly aisy thoughts aatay hain k husband mistreat karngy aur uss khood aziati
mein maza bhi aata hy.issi mein soo jaati hon aur jagny per b thakan c hoti hy.dimagh abnd lagta hay.
6. crying ka tub dil chahta hy jub parents ki taraf sy
tension ho werna nahi.
7.Alhamdolillah i hv always bn very hopeful abt my future
even when i was too ill to live my normal life.
8.helplessness aur worthlessness feeling b htth hoti hy jub
mujhy lagta hy k humary lyey life guzarna kitna mushkil hy choti choti baat pay
kurhna aur tension specially jub childhood sy sunn rahy ho parents sy k hum yeh
yeh krty hai tum logo k lye koi maa baap itna nahi krty laikn tum logo ko
ehsaas nahi.itni tension detay hain k tub rona b aata hy lagta hy dimagh phat
jaiga ya band ho jaiga.i feel so guilty all the time k parents ko humari waja
sy boht takleef hy.
9.low self-esteem tou aisa hy k koi boht b ehsas dilaye k
mai important hon tou yaqeen nahi aata ulta negative thoughts aati hain.aur
agar koi bura kery tou ghussa to boht aata hy aur jawab b de deti hon laikn
baad mein akely mein sochti hon k mai yahi deserve krti hon mujh mein hi
ghaltian aur weaknesses hain.
10.mujhy dosry khayal matlab doosro k baary mein negative
andaazy ziada hotay hain pata nahi kehna chahye ya nahi laikn meri mother doosro
sy boht jald bad-gumaan hoti hai ziada tr negative sochti hai to agar mai
positive b sochna chahon tou woh kehti hai k falan bandy nay yh baat iss liay
ki hogi ya karega matlab agar kuch na b kia ho kissi ny tou woh kehti hai daikhna
yeh banda aisa karaiga.apny bacho k barey mein b unki soch kuch aisi hi hy.woh apny bacho ki help laina b passand anhi kertin.
11.no,thoughts of death nahi aati aisa lagta hy k ziada tension ki wajah sey
dimagh phat jaiga laikn suicidal tendency Alhamdolillah nahi hy mujhy lagta hy
life mein itni zehni aziiat k baad yaqeenan mery lye Allah ny khushian b rakhi
hongi.
12.mai novels parhti thi ab interest nahi hy ya boht kam
kabhi read kerti hon,friendship thi ab kaafi arsay se friends sy contact nahi
sirf siblings sy achhi understanding hay.
Mery saath yeh b masla hay k mai aik kaam baar baar krti hon
jaisy k abhi typing krtay waqt b khayal hy k ghalti na ho baar baar type kr
rahi hon aur bolti hon to boht excited ho ker bolti hon yani taiz aur jaldi
jaldi.
I have tried to keep my answers short.I’m Really Thankful for
ur time nd consideration.Lots of Prayers for u n ur family.
Group: Members Joined: 04th Mar, 2011 Topic: 11 Post: 1222 Age:
33
Posted on:8th Dec 2012, 12:01am
GullRukh:
Walaikum Salam!
Thank you so much for your kind words. And you are very welcome.
First, let me give you some feedback on your replies.
1. Aap na apna mood 5 par rate kia hai. Iska matlab yeh hai keh aap keh rahee hain keh mostly aap nah sad feel kartee hain, nah happy. Balkeh mostly aap ka mood normal hota hai. Is that right?
2. Depression aur anxiety, donon mein poor concentration ki problem hoti hai. Aur indecisiveness ki main reason low self confidence hai, jis mein apni abilities par trust nahin rehta aur phir nah chahtay hoa bhee banda doosron ki likes/dislikes ko daikhta hoa faisla karna lagta hai, aur phir frustrated feel karta hai keh khud sa apni mazri ka faasla kion nahin kia.
3. Mood swings unstable mood ki possibility show karta hain. Non depressed logon ka andar frustration tolerence ( frustrating baaton ko bardaasht karna ki taqat) kaafi acchee hoti hai. Magar jab ham depressed hota hain, to hamari frustration tolerence bohot low ho jaati hai, jiska matlab hai keh depressed log choti choti baaton par over react karna lagtay hain, aur unka mood aik normal level par rehna ka bajae, choti choti cheezon aur baaton ka reaction mein bohot ziada up and down shift hota rehta hai.
4. Lack of energy, depression ka main symptom hai. Aur aap na jo over eating ki baat batai,... "yeh alag baat k mindless eating ziada hoti hy.Ajeeb c baat hy mujhy lagta hy mai apni bhook sy ziada apny andar kisi aur chez ko satisfy krnay k lyey ziada khaati hon." Aisa uss waqt hota hai jab koi person aisa feel karna lagay keh uski life mein uska kisi cheez par control nahin raha. Aur phir food aur eating aik aisee cheez ban jaati hai jo uss person ko control ki feeling daitee hai, aur issi lia woh person overeating karna lagta hai, magar asal mein woh apna pait ki bhook nahin, apna lack of control ki bhook ko mita raha hota hai, mindless eating ka zarye. I hope you understood what I just explained. Agar yeh cheez bohot ziada severe ho jae to eating disorders ki shakal ikhtiaar kar laitee hai.
5. Depression aur anxiety ka aik bohot common symptom lack of sleep hai. Iska illawa aksar bachay, jinko bachpan mein maar parrti rahee ho, unko nightmares aur bad dreams ki problem bhee ho jaati hai. Kia aap ko aisa koiproblem to nahin?
6. Yeh bohot acchee baat hai keh aap ko unnecessary crying episodes nahin hota.
7. Hopelessness, severe depression ki possibility show kartee hai. Yeh bohot hi acchee baat hai keh aap ko hopelessness ki feelings nahin hain, aur aap apna future ka baaray mein hopeful aur optimistic hain. That really is a very good sign. :)
8. Helplessness, aur worthlessness ki main reason lack of self confidence, depression, aur lack of self esteem hain. Aur unnecessary guilt aur self blame bhee worthlessness ki feelings ki wajah say paida hota hai.
9. Aap na khud hi correctly point out kar dia keh aap ki lack of self esteem ki main wajah aap ki negative thoughts hain. Jab ham depressed hota hain, to hamain apni positive qualities nazar nahin aatein, aur apni khamian aur negative qualities magnify ho kar nazar aati hain. Isko scientific terms mein cognitive distortions ( errors in thinking) kehta hain, aur aisee thinking depression ka patients mein bohot ziada hoti hai.
10. Depressed logon mein aik aur thinking error ya cognitive distortion yeh hoti hai keh depressed log future ka baaray mein aur doosray logon ka baaray mein ghalat aur negative andaza lagana lagtay hain, jaisa keh aap na bataya.
11. That's very good. Actually, hopefullness, aur lack of suicidal thoughts, bohot acchha sign hain, aur aisa log proper treatment say bohot improve ho jaatay hain.
12. Lack of interest in hobbies and previously pleasurabe activities, yeh bhee depression ka bohot common symptom hai. On the other hand, yeh bohot acchhe baat hai keh aap ki siblings ka saath acchhe understanding hai.
Koi cheez baar baar karna keh kaheen ghalat nah ho gae ho, yeh obscessive compulsive disorder ( a common anxiety disorder) ka bhee main symptom hai, aur lack of self confidence ki manifestation bhee.
Yeh to thaa feedback, ab iska basis par meiin na kia conclusion nikala hai, woh bhee aap ko bata doon.
Jo kuch aap na bataya, uska basis par mera yehi opinion hai keh aap ki main problem depression hai ( yeh saaray questions jo mein na aap sa poocha thay yeh depression ka symptoms ko assess karna ka lia thay), magar acchhe baat yeh keh aap ki depression bohot ziada severe nahin ( based upon lack of suicidal thinking, and also based upon the fact that you remain hopeful about the future), magar you definitely need treatment. Anxiety bhee kisi had tak hai, magar main problem depression hai, anxiety is not as big of an issue atleast at this time.
Acchhe baat yeh keh bohot si cheezain aap ki favor mein jaati hain. Most importantly yeh keh aap intelligent aur bright hain mashallah, aur yeh factor treatment ki success ka chances ko barrha daita hai. Second yeh keh aap motivated hain apna aap ko iss depression sa nikalna kay lia, as compared to someone who feels defeated and dejected.
Ok, I gotta go now... inshallah kal mein detail say aap ko aap ka treatment options bata doon gaa, including their pros and cons.
Jo kuch mein na aap ko bataya, yeh sirf aap na apni post mein jo kuch mention kia, aur mera questions ka jo aap na reply dia, uska basis par kaha. Ho sakta hai mera opinion aur meri assessment bilkul ghalat ho, kionkeh waqai internet par exact opinion dena bohot mushkil hai.
Thanks alot for your best wishes and encouragement Sir And
also i’m grateful for your detailed problem assessment.
Aap nay poocha k mai nay apna mood 1-10 scale pr 5 rakha hy
matlab mera mood normal rehta hy infact truly speaking mai sahi terha sy
explain nahi kr paa rahi.mai agar iss barey main sochoun tou mujhay sirf itna
hi pata chalta hay k abhi mai apni present life sy khush houn magar her waqt
anxiety rehti hay matlab iss baat ki jaldi k time na nikal jaye jaldi jaldi
saary kaam kr loun ager koi tok de kissi baat pr tou jaldi irritate hojati houn
baaki ghar walo k saath mazaq bhi ker laity hon laikn serious jaldi ho jaati
hon.aik unknown fear bhi rehta hy shayad lack of confidence ki wajah sey.baaki
mujhay samajh nahi aa rahi k mood ko kaisy explain karoun.
Aapnay mindless eating ki wajah lack of control bataya.isska
matlab theek terha samajh nahi aaya laikn yeh baat hay k mai her cez ko ‘in
control’ rakhnay ki koshish krti hon aur iss hawaly sey dimagh ko boht ziada
soch soch kr thakati hon k in future X,Y,Z etc situation mein kaisy act n react
karoungi isski wajah sy mera dimagh jakra hua rehta hay breathing proper nahi
aur health affect ho rahi hy.
Doosra mujhay nightmares nahi aatay.....mujhay yaqeen nahi
aa raha k mai anxiety ko apna bara masla samajh rahi thi laikn mujhay tou
Depression hay J
Jo k Insha Allah thek ho jaigi kuk mai apni life aisy mazeed nahi guzar sakti
crippled soch k saath.
Yes, i know it’s too difficult and risky to assess a patient’s
actual problem accurately by mere an interaction through internet and i can understand what you are trying to say.Besides i’m satisfied with your conclusion
and the way you have explained everything to me.
Will wait for your further respose. May Allah Bless you and
keeps you n your family safe and always happy.
Group: Members Joined: 04th Mar, 2011 Topic: 11 Post: 1222 Age:
33
Posted on:8th Dec 2012, 11:32pm
GullRukh:
Walaikum Salam.
Once again, you are very welcome. And thanks again for your prayers and kind words.
Gee, bohot commonly aisa hota hai keh depression aur sadness ki feelings irritability ki shakal mein manifest kartee hain.
Overeating aur control ka baaray mein mera kehna ka matlab yeh thaaa keh jab hamaray thoughts aur emotions par hamara control nahin rehta, jiski wajah say ham life mein helpless aur powerless feel kartay hain, to inn powerlessness aur lack of control ki feelings ko overcome karna kay lia ham koi aisee cheez karna lagtay hain ( jaisa overeating) jiski wajah say hamain aik false sense of control feel hona lagta hai.
Yeh acchhe baat hai keh aap ko nightmares nahin aatay. Aur mein yeh nahin keh raha keh aap ko sirf depression hai. Most certainly, you have a combination of anxiety and depression. Aur jab anxiety aur depression ka combination ho tou phir priority yeh hoti hai keh depression ko treat kia jae, aur aksar aisa hota hai keh jaisa jaisa depression ka treatment ki wajah say depression kam hoti jaati hai, anxiety bhee khud ba khud kam hoti jaati hai.
Ok, let's talk a little bit about what you need to do to get your life back on track.
Sab say pehla to yeh keh aap ko yeh fact clearly patah hona chahye keh hamara zehan mein 24 ghanta jo soch aur thoughts aati hain, aur ham 24 ghanta jo kuch sochta rehta hain, woh thoughts hamara mood ko happy yaa sad banati hain. Agar hamari thoughts negative hon gee, jaisa yeh sochna keh mein kaisa falan person ka saamna karoon gi, yaa mein iss qaabil nahin keh koi mujha acchha treat karay, to inn negative thoughts ka nateja mein hamara mood bhee sad aur down feel karay gaa. aur agar hamari thoughts positive hon gee, to as a result, hamara mood bhee happy ho gaa, THIS IS A FACT.
Ab sawal yeh hai keh ham apni negative thoughts ko positive kaisa banain? Aur iska jawab yeh hai keh aisa possible hai, bas thorri mental effort aur practice karnee parrtee hai, aur phir ham ahista ahista apni thoughts ko change kar keh apni depression ko overcome kar saktay hain. Iss technique ko Cognitive Behavior Therapy ( CBT) kehta hain, aur yeh mild to moderate depression ka lia bohot bohot effective hoti hai. Generally, iska liya 13 weeks tak weekly sessions hota hain, 50 minutes long, aur kabhee kabhaar 13 weeks say ziada bhee lag saktay hain. Agar aap ka city mein koi CBT ka expert therapist hai to bohot acchhe baat hai, otherwise, aap khud bhee self help books ki madad say CBT ki basic techniques seekh kar unn ko implement kar saktee hain. Kisi bhee acchhaa book store say jahan foreign books available hoon, wahan say CBT for anxiety and depression ki self help book lai lain. Agar aap kahain to mein aap ko 2,3 acchhe, aur easy to read books ka naam bhee bata doon, aur yeh books, self help books hain, which basically means that you do not need to be an expert to use these books. These are written for the lay person.
Unfortunately, CBT techniques sirf mild to moderate anxiety aur depression ka lia effective hai, magar ziada severe anxiety aur depression kay lia mediccations hi best aur most effective options hoti hain. Acchhe baat yeh hai keh anxiety aur depression ka lia 2 alag alag meds ki zaroorat nahin, kuch meds aisee hain jo anxiety aur depression ko aik saath treat kartee hain. Magar jab aap yeh meds start karain to start mein 4-5 weeks tak koi benefits nazar nahin aatay, approximately 6 weeks ka baad jaa kar yeh meds apni effectiveness show kartee hain. Aur yeh meds din mein sirf 1 martaba khani hoti hain, aur inka side effects bhee mild hota hain. Forum par medications ka naam batani ki ijazat nahin hai, iss lia mein aap ko sirf yeh bata daita hoon keh I am talking about SSRI class of medications. Aap SSRI search kar lain, you would find a ton of info.
Aap CBT ka option use karna chahtee hain yaa medication ka, yeh to aap ka hi decision hai. Donon ka apna apna benefits hain. Agar mujh sa poochain, to mera vote definitely medication ki favor mein hai. Beleive me, your life will change, Inshallah.
Aap internet par CBT aur SSRI search karain, aur phir decide karain keh aap kay lia kon saa option ziada behtar hai. Aur agar koi questions zehan mein aaian to pooch lain, I would help you make a decision.
Unfortunately, I have to go now. Magar aap ki present situation ka lia, jis mein aap ko anxiety aur stress ka kaafi symptoms hain, iska lia kal mein aap ko 1,2 quick anxiety reduction techniques bataon gaa, jin ko practice kar keh aap apna stress level 2,3 din ka andar andar kaafi reduce kar lain gee, and you would start feeling much relaxed in your day to day activities. Shart yeh hai keh aap ko yeh techniques proper tareeqa say daily 2-3 times karnee hon gee , ( it only takes about 3 minutes to do them) and then you would see a significant decrease in your anxiety and stress level, I promise :)
Apna bohot khayal rakhye gaa.
With my prayers and best wishes for a happy and healthy life... a life where you are in control of your emotions, and not the one where your emotions control you.
Aapka boht boht Shukria itna detaile aur easy way mein samjhanay ka aur
good wishes k lya bhi Thanks J
Mai nay search kia hay internet per CBT aur SSRIs aur mai
itna samjhi hon k SSRI ka quick response hay as compare to CBT aur yeh help kerta
hay CBT ko effective banany mein aur yeh k CBT long term mein boht effective
hay aur relapse chances nahi hai agar theek terha sey ki jaye laikn time taking
hay jaisy k aapnay bhi apni post mein bataya hay.Aapka opinion hay k medication
li jaye mai khud bhi medication laina chahti houn alongwith CBT as a self help
kuk kissi therapist k paas jana possible nahi.Laikin iss wakt mera masla yeh hay
k sub sy pehli baat mai medicines mangwanay k lyey parents per dependent hon
woh mujhay yeh medicines laa ker daingy nahi ager mai kissi terha sy manage kr
b loun tou doosra masla yeh hay k meri jald hi shadi hony waali hy mai wahan
apny husband sy chup kr yeh medicines use nahi kerna chahti aur batany ki b
himmat nahi mujh mein teesra yeh hay k inn medicines k side affects jo batay
gaye hain kia after marriage issko use kerna theek hoga?aur aap nay jaisy kaha
k is forum pay medication nahi batayee jaatin tou mujhay kaisy pata chalaiga
exactly konsi medicine under SSRI mery lyay theek hay aur kia 2 medicines in
combination use kerna behtar hay? Kuk SSRIs mein koi 6 medicines mai nay daikhi
hain (search results mein may nay ‘Mayo clinic’ ko pehlay click kia tha) aur Kitnay
arsay k lye main use ker sakti hon?yeh sub mujhay kaisay pata chalaiga?
Ab important baat yeh poochna chahti hon k kia sirf CBT sey
mera depression thek hosakta hay? certainly yeh boht sabar wala kaam hy laikn
agar main medicines nahi lai sakti tou meray paas CBT ka option hi reh jaata
hay.Mera depression mild hay, moderate ya severe?
Aap nay mujhay kuch stress n anxiety relieving techniques batanay ka kaha hay Insha
Allah mai definitely follow karoungi aur saath mein please CBT ki books bhi
bata dain jo k Islamabad aur Peshwar mein mil sakein mujhay.I’ll wait for your valued
response.
May Allah Bless You n your family with all the health,happiness
and goodness in life Aamen, Sum Aamen.
Sir! mera aik aur masla hay meri finger tips per deep vertical lines hain jubk dono thumbs pay deep horizontal aur vertical lines hain yeh lines haath k ultay taraf tak nikli hue hain aur haath sirf finger tips pay wrinkly sa lagta hain,samajh nahi aati aisa kiu hay? kia body mein kissi chez ki kami ki wajah sey hay?
Gullrukh ap k problem just psychologial hay, ap depression ka shika ho cho ki ho, kafi sensitive ho ap, subah fresh is ley fel nahi kerti k ap k neend pori nahi ho paa rahi hay
neend may daanto ka chabna tension ki waja se hota hy
tips ap k ley short ya hain
her insan k sath problem atein rehty hain, koi bi aisa shakhs nahi jis k pas koi probelm na ho, lakin oun probelm k slov hone ka socha karo, ulta apny ap ko inferiority complex may mut dalo, balky superiority k asner apny zehan p ghalib karoo yahee mind ma rakho k u r da best,
her baat ko ser p sawar mut kiaya karoo, yahee samjho k jo koch howa so howa ya zindagi ka hisa hay insan k sath problems atein rehty hain
try karo k kisi sincere dost k sath apna sub koch share kia karoo
agar ap tension wali sari batein mind se jhatak ti jao tu ap ki sehat bi theek rahy ga, neend bi theek se aygi or khush b raho gi
Group: Members Joined: 04th Mar, 2011 Topic: 11 Post: 1222 Age:
33
Posted on:10th Dec 2012, 1:03pm
GullRukh:
Walaikum Salam.
Thanks for your kind words, and you are very welcome. I am glad to be of some help to you.
Aap na CBT aur SSRIs ka baaray mein search kia, that's very good. CBT ka option bohot ziada time consuming nahin haa, agar self help ka tor par use ki jae. Kionkeh, basically CBT mein apni negative thoughts ko positive thoughts mein change karna sikhaya jaata hai, and you can start benefitting from day 1, as long as you practice and implement those strategies.
SSRIs mein jo 6 meds hain, woh sab ki sab depression aur anxiety ka lia bohot acchhe hain, magar unka side effects thorra thorra different hain. For example agar unn mein say 1 medicine sleep laati hai, as a side effect to woh uss person ka lia behtar ho gee jisko raat mein neend nah aati depression ki wajah say. Issi tarah inn mein say 1 med aisee hai, jo energy laati hai, that one would be good for someone with low energy due to depression. Magar jahan tak depression mein improvement ki baat hai, they are all equally good. Aur even though SSRIs are antidepressants, but they are equally good in treating anxiety as well. So basically, you can kill 2 birds with one stone.
Mein aap ki baat bohot acchhee tarah samajh sakta hoon keh aap apna parents ka ooper dependent hain, aur mein iss baat saay bhee fully agree karta hoon keh aap ko apna husband say chup kar medication nahin lainee chahyee. Mein khud aap ko yehi suggest karoon ga keh agar aap medication ka option pursue karna chahain, to phir properly kisi doctor ka under teatment reh kar yeh medications lain. Jahan tak SSRIs ka side efefcts ki baat hai, side effects are generally mild, aur start ka first 5-7 days mein upset stomach, nausea, aur headaches ka illawa reallistically speaking, inn meds ka side effects bohot kam hain. Married life say related inka aik side effect hai, which is slight decrease in libido( slight decrease in sexual desire). Magar yeh fact hai keh un treated depression, sexual desire ko aur bhee ziada effect karti hai. Aur inn meds ki wajah say jab depression kam hoti hai, to infact sexual desire normalize ho jaati hai.
Aap ka lia ideal option, in my opinion, yeh ho gaa keh aap kisi acchha doctor ka under treatment reh kar inn mein sa koi med start kar dain, jo woh doctor recommend karain. Unfortunately, I can't be more specific, I hope you understand. Aur yeh meds atleast 6-9 months tak khani hoti hain.
Mein jaanta hoon keh shayed yeh option aap ka lia abhee practical nah ho, iss soorat mein aap ka second best option, jo shayed practically aap ka lia best option hai iss waqt, woh yeh keh aap CBT as self help startkar dain. CBT mild to moderate depression ka lia useful hai, aur iss say aap ko bohot barra advantage yeh ho gaa keh aap apni thinking ko apna control mein karna seekh jaaian gee, with improvement in your mood, and decreasing your anxiety. Aap ki depression moderate level ki hai, as evidenced by the fact that it effects several areas of your life, including your interpersonal relationships, your self esteem, and your body functioning, eg lack of sleep, lack of energy etc etc. It is not severe as evidenced by the fact that you remain hopeful and optimistic and and that you are not suicidal. CBT ki success iss baat par depend karti hai keh aap CBT techniques seekhna mein kitni effort lagati hain, aur phir inn ko kitna apni life mein implement kartee hain. They are easy to use techniques, but very very powerful if used correctly. Aap ki depression aur anxiety jis level ki hai, uss mein CBT say atleast noticeable improvement ho gee, magar, full relief nahin aae gaa, in my opinion.
Aap ko aik book bata raha hoon, uska naam hai The Feeling Good Handbook, by David D. Burns, MD. Yeh excellent book hai anxiety aur depression ka lia CBT techniques seekhna ka lia. Aap amazon ki site par jaa kar check kar lain, aap ko yeh book nazar aa jae gee. Aur phir Islamabad ya Peshawar ka kisi acchha bookstore say patah kar lain keh kia woh yeh book aap ka lia mangwa saktay hain. Yaa phir agar aap ka koi relatives US mein hain to unn say bhee mangwa saktee hain.
I know mein na aap ko anxiety reduction technique batana thee, magar abhee mera paas time nahin, agar ho saka to after a few hours, yaa phir kal bata doon gaa.
Fingertips par jo lines hain, kia woh fingernails par hain, yaa doosri taraf? Aur yeh lines kitna arsa sa hain? Wrinkly skin ki kae reasons ho saktee hain, agar aap kuch aur details bata dain to ziada behtar jawab dia jaa sakta hai.
Once again aap nay her cheez boht asaan lafzo mein aur tafseel sey samjha di hay aur mai samajh bhi gayee hon.Ji Sir! meray paas ab self help ka option hi reh jata hay mai definitely yeh book mangwaanay ki koshish kerti hon jaisy bhi possible hosaka aur Insha Allah issy follow bhi karoungi.
jahan tak finger tips pay deep lines ki baat hay woh pehli pooro sey bhi neechay tak chali gayee hain jisy shayad ungli ka doosra band kehtay hain aur issi terha unglio k back side tak gayee hain nails per nahin hain nails per tou sirf dots sey thay tub jub anxiety ziada thi beech mein yeh dots bilkul ghayab hogay thay laikn ab kuch dino sey boht thoray sy dots dobara aa gaye hain aur inka koi colour nahi hay. baaki skin problem ya allergies kuch nahi may b water intake itna nahi mai nay vitamin E capsules mangwaye hain,also trying to drink much water doosra meri knees mein popping n cracking ki awaaz aati hay laikn aur koi pain waghaira nahi hota issk saath.bus yeh last problem thi i'm sorry mai problems pay problems bataye jaa rahi houn.but this was last one.baaki aapki anxiety reducing techniques ka weight karoungi.
May Allah keep you Healthy and Always Happy with all the strength for the good deeds you do Aamen Sum aamen :-)
Thank You for your post i appreciate your suggestions. and yes i know 'i'm the Best' works very well but i hv bn hesitant to try it :( i hv tried mirror therapy as well but merely for few days which obviously doesn't give result. anyhow i'l try make positive assertions to myselp specially 'i'm the best' one.
Group: Members Joined: 04th Mar, 2011 Topic: 11 Post: 1222 Age:
33
Posted on:11th Dec 2012, 11:57pm
GullRukh:
Walaikum Salam.
You are most welcome, and I really apologize for the late reply.
Sab say pehla mein aap ko anxiety reduction technique bata doon. Hamari breathing ka hamara stress level say bohot gehra talluq hota hai. Generally, jab ham under stress hota hain to hamari breathing fast and shallow ho jaati hai, aur yeh fast and shallow way of breathing further stress cause kartee hai. On the other hand, agar ham apni breathing ko fast and shallow ka bajae slow and deep karna seekh jaaian to body ka natural relaxation response kick in ho jaata hai, aur iss tarah ki breathing say stress aur anxiety paani ka jhaag ki tarah beth jaati hai. Magar yeh deep breathing proper tareeqa sa karna zaroori hai, aur yehi method mein aap ko sikha raha hoon. It is very simple, yet extremely effective.
Sab say pehla kisi comfortable chair par beth jaaian, aur apna zehan sirf aur sirf apni breathing par focus karain. Aap na 10-12 deep breaths lainee hain, woh iss tarah keh exhale karna ki duration, inhale karna ki duration ka double ho. For example, aap slowly breath in karain ( inhale karain) for about 4 seconds, iss tarah keh air aap ka lungs ko fully fill kar day, aur aap ka belly bahar ki taraf move karta feel ho. Phir uska baad air ko taqreeban 3 seconds tak andar hold karain, aur uska baad slowly exhale karain ( saans bahar nikalain), for about 8 seconds. Yeh hoi aik breath. Aisee 10 - 12 breaths lain practice karna ka lia, making sure keh exhale karna ki duration, inhale karna ki duration ka almost double ho.
Shorow shorow mein aap ko apna zehan mein seconds count karna parrain gay, magar jab aap ko practice ho jae gee, then all this process would become second nature to you, and you would be able to do it without any conscious mental effort, and by doing this, you would be able to trigger the body's relaxation response almost at will. Isn't that great?
Yeh cheez aap ko start mein atleast 3-4 times a day practice karnee hai, aur jab aap iss mein perfect ho jaaian to phir aap jab chahain, jitni martaba chahain yeh kar saktee hain.
Aap sahih tareeqa say deep breaths lay rahee hain ( jisko abdominal breathing) bhee kehtay hain, yeh confirm karna ka lia start mein aap yeh bhee kar saktee hain keh deep breaths practice kartay waqt apna left hand apni chest par rakh lain, aur apna right hand apna abdomen par. Proper deep breaths ki pehchaan yeh hai keh jab aap saans andar lain gee to aap ka right hand ( jo aap ka abdomen par hai), woh aap ka left hand ( jo aap ki chest par hai) ka muqable mein ziada move karay gaa. Please let me know if anything is not clear.
Yeh kehna ko aik bohot simple strategy hai, magar stress aur anxiety reduce karna ka lia, aur relaxation ki feelings create karna ka lia bohot hi effective, agar proper way mein ki jae. Aur iss mein sirf taqreeban 2-3 minutes lagtay hain.
I hope you would find it useful, as it would also give you a some sense of control over your anxiety, and you would not feel as overwhelmed because you will know that you have the power to control your anxiety and stress.
Ok, so let's now focus our attention on your physical complaints. Aur aap ko sorry karna ki zaroorat nahin, aap jo chahain pooch saktee hain, it doesn't bother me at all.
Aap na apni fingers ki jo situation batai, waisa to baghair dekha aur examine kia kuch kehna bohot mushkil hai, magar bohot si cheezon ki wajah say skin apni normal elasticity loose kar daitee hai, aur wrinkly nazar aati hai, for example dehydration ( jaisa keh aap na khud bhee kaha keh aap paani kam peeti hain); iska illawa improper diet aur lack of certain vitamins aur minerals bhee aisa cause kar saktay hain. Koshish karain keh properly hydrated raha karain, aur apni diet balanced rakhain, with a good balance of proteins, carbs, essential fats, vitamins and minerals. Agar chahain to koi multivitamin jis mein Vitamins A,C, aur E hon, woh bhee beneficial ho gaa. Baharhaal, once again, proper examine kia baghair kuch kehna bohot mushkil hai.
Knoee popping aur cracking bhee aik relatively common problem hai, aur generally speaking, agar pain nahin hai to fikar karna ki zaroorat nahin. Iss popping ki aik wajah yeh bhee hoti hai keh knee cap sa jo muscles attach hota hain, unn mein say aik muscle ziada strong ho jaata hai , jiski wajah say woh knee cap ko aik side par pull karta hai jiski wajah say knee cap slide kartay hoa aik taraf ko pull ho jaata hai aur awaaz aati hai. issi tarah knee cap ka peecha jo cartilage hota hai, kabhee kabhaar uski wajah say bhee popping ki awaaz aati hai. Agar aap ko pain nahin, then don't worry about it. Koshish karain keh thorri bohot exercise kia karain, and try to loose weight if you are overweight.
Anyway, I gotta go now. I hope that you would be able to practice the deep breathing exercises just the way I have told you. Once you have mastered this technique, you will feel much more comfortable in your ability to fight against your worries, stress and anxiety, as you will have the confidence of knowing that you have a very effective weapon in your arsenal to combat your anxiety.
Please feel free to ask if anything is not clear. Also, if you would like, I would be happy to explain some basic CBT skills for you to help you get started.
It appears to me that you are a bright and intelligent young lady, and with proper tools and techniques, and with Allah's will, I don't see any reason why you can't overcome your crippling emotions.
I certainly wish you all the best as you embark upon your journey to take control of your emotions, so that you can live your life to the fullest. Because, you deserve it.
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