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Dr.Tariqs |
Group: Members Joined: 08th May, 2008 Topic: 1 Post: 4 Age:
30
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 2:30am |
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 Marriage Problem: I Want To Get Marry But Parents Not Agree
Main ek larki ko bohot pasand karta hoon 5 saal se. Aur hamari Love story main sab kuch hochuka hai siwae Intercourse ke. maine 2 dafa larki ke ghar pe rishta bhi bhijwaya hai lekin unki ammi nahin manti. uski 2 wajah jain ek to language difference doosra age difference woh mujhse 4 saal bari hain. zahir hai itna arsa kese control kia jasakt hai?? pehle hum milte thay ab woh bhi nahin mil sakte us ke ghar walon ne pabandi lagadi hai. aap log kuch help kijie plz. I love her much.
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Veer |
Group: Members Joined: 12th Oct, 2011 Topic: 85 Post: 4718 Age:
30
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 8:23am |
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Dr.Tariqs dear welcome in this forum..aap ka pehla post hai aur aap ne yahan hum se baat share ki its good..inshallah aap k masle ka hal bhi nikal aye ga..
main aap ki feeling samuj sakta hon ke aap kya feel karte ho ge apne pyar ki bigair
pyar mein zaat paat,age,ameeri kareebi, yeh sab nehin dekha jata...medical point of view se ladki ager ladke se bhari ho to koi harj nehin..lekin yahan pakistan main yeh baat bhut hamiyat rakhti hai. es liye ladki ke maa baap nehin maan rahe..
mera mashwara yeh hai ke aap os ki ami ko manao aur on ko samujao ke age bhari choti se kuch nehin hota.ager aap k sath ladki hai aur woh bhi bhut pyar karti hai aap se to umeed hai woh bhi apne ghar walo ko mana le gi.
rehi baat pabandi ki jab ghar mein sab ko pata chal jaye ishq ka to pabandiya he lagti hai..aap es baat ko chooro aur shaadi karne ke bare mein socho os ke ghar walo ko ladki ke sath mel kar manao..inshallah sab theek ho jaye ga |
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pappumelon |
Group: Members Joined: 22nd Apr, 2008 Topic: 2 Post: 31 Age:
32
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 9:24am |
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Dr Saab! Be a man, app apnay Doctory ko time dain, agar muamla itna hi serious hay tu app ki lover ko bi utna hi fikar hona chahiye, or app ki batoon say aisa lagta hay k un ko koi tension nahen, i dont mean k app us ko leave kar do lakin us kay dil apnay liye kuch value create karo otherwise after marraige bohat maslay hon gay.
Good Luck |
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Bili_miau |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 871 Age:
26
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 10:18am |
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well y dont u send a few respected memebers of ur community to their house and ask them the real reason for refusing u...they even help u both to get back together!!
its not going to take u anywhere if u keep sending ur parents or keep asking them in the same way..try out sumthing different...try to impress them |
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~~HITMAN~~ |
Group: Members Joined: 09th May, 2011 Topic: 122 Post: 4287 Age:
28
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 10:23am |
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Dr. sahab ye kaam larki zyada behtar kar sakti hai.......larki ko bolay k wo apne parents par zor de aur kisi bhi tarha unko manwanay ki koshish karay....... phir kuch prob solve hosakti hai.........
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Bili_miau |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 871 Age:
26
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 10:25am |
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hmm this is nt the bst suggestion hitman..u knw that women nd specially unmarried girls have no say or very lil say in our community..if she tells them directly abt this guy they might find it very rude nd take it in a negative way....unless or otherwise they r open minded ,,....but i dnt think thats the case! |
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~~HITMAN~~ |
Group: Members Joined: 09th May, 2011 Topic: 122 Post: 4287 Age:
28
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 10:30am |
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ajkal ki girls main himmat hai agar larki ka pyaar sucha hai tou phir larki ko hi baat karni paray gi aur kuch bold steps uthanay paray gay.........jis tarha usnay shaadi say pehley kuch bold steps liyain hain ...........
aur dr k mutabik wo inhain pehley hi reject karchukay hain.......
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Bili_miau |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 871 Age:
26
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| Posted on:8th May 2008, 10:31am |
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khub asi batein apne ghar me keh kar marna he unho ne? kis duniya me reht e hain aap |
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zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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| Posted on:9th May 2008, 3:17am |
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Dr tariq im agreed to veer
act on his advices
InshaAllah sub thik ho jaye ga |
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Dr.Tariqs |
Group: Members Joined: 08th May, 2008 Topic: 1 Post: 4 Age:
30
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| Posted on:13th May 2008, 6:34am |
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 FOR ALL
Actually major problem age factor nahin, problem language ka hai, they are punjabi speaking and i am sindhi, well 5 fingers are not equal, i am belong to very educated family aur society main ek acha status hai, main pehle faltoo bekar ghoomta tha us larki ne mujhe himmat dillai aur ALLAH ka shukar hai aaj main 2 jobs kar raha hoon aur meri salary bhi achi hai. unke ghar main sab raazi hain siwae unki ammi ke. aur woh larki mujhse sachi muhabbat karti hai lekin kehti hai main chati hoon ke main maan baap ki nafarmani na karoon uska dil na dukhaoon aur unki duaen lekar is ghar se rukhsat hoon. bas yeh problem hai. rahi baat age kie to main us larki se age main bara hee lagta hoon kyunke meri health MASHALLAH achi hai. us ne mera poora saath dia hai hamesha hum ne har tarah ka pyar bhi kiya hai lekin main chahta hoon hum jaldi Shadi karlen. waiting for your best replies of my problem........ |
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zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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| Posted on:13th May 2008, 6:41am |
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dear Tariq dont worry...Allah se dua keryen sub thik ho jaye ga
jo ap k liye behter ho ga wohi ho ga
u said k us k baki sub ghar waley man gaye hain....to unhen us ki ammi ko manana chahiye...aur sath hi ap aur ap k ghar waley bi unhen mananay ki koshish keryen....InshaAllah sub thik ho jaye ga |
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zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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| Posted on:13th May 2008, 6:42am |
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dear Tariq dont worry...Allah se dua keryen sub thik ho jaye ga
jo ap k liye behter ho ga wohi ho ga
u said k us k baki sub ghar waley man gaye hain....to unhen us ki ammi ko manana chahiye...aur sath hi ap aur ap k ghar waley bi unhen mananay ki koshish keryen....InshaAllah sub thik ho jaye ga |
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Dr.Tariqs |
Group: Members Joined: 08th May, 2008 Topic: 1 Post: 4 Age:
30
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| Posted on:14th May 2008, 1:18am |
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 DEAR ZEB
Humne bohot koshish ki hai lekin unke zehan main pata nahin kisne yeh baat daal di hai ke sindhi log 2 shadian karte hain aur woh baad main tumhe chordega aur pata nahin kia kia. Meri uske ghar walon se baat nahin hoti. you insaan ya to pyar nahin kare aur agar ek dafa sex hojae to phir frustration hoti hai. ALLAH ka shukar hai mene aaj tak kisi aur larki ke jism ko nahin touch kia aur main nahin chahta ke aisa ho is lie main us se jald hee shadi karna chahta hoon aur usko bohot pyar aur khushian dena chahta hoon. aap log plz koi solution bataen aur mere lie dua karen.
Thanks, waiting for your replies............ |
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zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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| Posted on:14th May 2008, 2:14am |
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DR Tariq ab yar mere pas to yahi mashwara tha....un ki ammi ko mananay k siwa aur kia kiya ja skta hai....sub kuch tumhare samney ho tum behter jantay aur samajhtey ho k kia kerna chahiye....un ki ghalat fehmi ko dur kerney ki koshhish kero....agar sindhi 1 se ziada shadiyan nai kertey aur tumharey khandaan mein bi aisa hai to phir unhen misaleyn do k sub sindhi 2 shadiyan nahi kertey.... |
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~~HITMAN~~ |
Group: Members Joined: 09th May, 2011 Topic: 122 Post: 4287 Age:
28
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| Posted on:14th May 2008, 5:18am |
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agree with zeb dr sahab is k ilawa aur koi zolution nazar nahi ata.......ya tou app unki waalda ko convince karnay ki koshish karain ya phir wo larki apni waalda ko convince karay.....aur unhain yakeen dilaye k app aesa nahi karaingay.......
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Veer |
Group: Members Joined: 12th Oct, 2011 Topic: 85 Post: 4718 Age:
30
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| Posted on:14th May 2008, 2:50pm |
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Dr.Tariq agreed with zeb and hitman..
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ferryahmed |
Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2007 Topic: 5 Post: 17 Age:
32
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| Posted on:24th May 2008, 1:33pm |
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I have got the same problem..!! hi there...i have got the same problem....i belong to karachi and im working as a software engineer in UK, and mashaAllah have acheived good social status and much healthy earning (Alhamdolillaah)
I am also in love with the girl who is 4 years elder than me.....im 26 and shes 30.....and the same problem that she belongs to punjabi family (although her family is living in karachi for decades, and she was born and bread in karachi and speaks much better urdu than my family....shes more than a karachi'ite), while i belong to a urdu-speaking behari family....
I have got exactly similar things to say abt her....that she IS the perfect wife for me....and have got outstanding qualities and love for me....even i love her very much...she has helped me gettnig to a position in which i am now......and has supported me in every respect. All the things are absolutely perfect, just other than the age factor and punjabi thing.
i havent send rishta to her house bcz when i talked to my parents abt her.....my parents just erupted with anger, and behaved in the most hardest way ever. my father said that its absolutely fatal marrying a girl elder than me...it will create long term problems....and also he has got very very negative image of punjabies....he thinks that punjabi families trap young well setled boys....and he thinks that the girl has trapped me as well bcz i live here in UK and even here im having much bright career in IT industry and having good salry in pounds.....he thinks im beign trapped and brain washed.....my parrnts are not conservative....but they insist that i MUST marry a girl younger than me and should be non-punjabbi...otherwise they wont accept any other girl....!!
i have also sticked to my decision, and i'll try every possible way to convince them, becz i love her more than anything, and she loves me soo much as well.....and has proved her love for me in various situations....
i know medically theres no issue marryign elder girl, apart from the fact she'll look older much earlier than me...and it might effect our sexual life....but regardless of everything and every fact....i am determined to marry her....and i cant even think of marrying any other girl.....i know its not gonna be an easy journey....but love is not bed of roses....
i pray to Allah for you...that may her parents agree and u get married to her soon....mere liye bhi dua karna yar....as im in the same situation...even worse...bcz yahan to mere hee parnts nahi man rahey.....and plz do tell me abt any issue/disadvantage both medically and otherwise of marrying to an elder girl.....plz help me out as well....
best regards....cheers
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Veer |
Group: Members Joined: 12th Oct, 2011 Topic: 85 Post: 4718 Age:
30
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| Posted on:24th May 2008, 1:37pm |
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ferryahmed aap apna masla new topic mein bataya kare..ta ke har koi read kare aur alag se jawab de aap ko..anyway main aap ka post start kar deta hon ab aap wahan jawab dena.. |
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ferryahmed |
Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2007 Topic: 5 Post: 17 Age:
32
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| Posted on:24th May 2008, 1:44pm |
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and one thing more.... ap yeh kersakte hain ke if ur parents are with you.....then send ur parents to her home and then openly discuss why her mother is refusing? then ur parents should try to clarify every concern and doubts shes having......ur parents then ask her exactly what are the issues...and then address those issues in a polite and convincing manner.....and ensure her that they and their family will treat the girl as their own daughter and never give her any tension...!!
u know....bcz no matter how much clarification u give....but when the same thing is told by ur parents in polite...and convincing manner....then she might agree to it....and also u said that all other ppl of her famiyl are agreed....so they might convince their mother as well.....and her mother will think that their parents are elder, much matured people....when they have clarified so many things then theres no point of refusing you....
good luck buddy.... |
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Veer |
Group: Members Joined: 12th Oct, 2011 Topic: 85 Post: 4718 Age:
30
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| Posted on:24th May 2008, 1:52pm |
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ferryahmed main ne aap ka new post start kar diya hai lehaza aap apna masla ya koi sawal ab wahan post kar sakte hain..app ka post hai I have got the same problem..!! |
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