Mera problem asee forum ka tamam members sai mukhtalif hain mera masla ya hai ka mere maa mujhe sai sirf asee laye kaye kaye din baat nahi kerte kyon ka asee kae bayte (mere behan) mujhe sai naraz hoti hai.
mere 2 sisters hain bare wali N wase toa mere bare behan kaye narasgi mere laye abh koye khas mayni nahi rakhte ( shaid mai useto ho gaye howi asee laye ya asee samjhne lag gaye howi)
N mujhe apne behan sai ziyada apne saas ya koye nand lagte hain jo baat baat jina ajiran kerna cahte ho. Mai aik webdesigner aur internet marketer howi aur mere pass apne websites ko manage kerne ka allawa itna waqt bai nahi hota ka apne dost ko e-mail ker sakwoye. net friends toa dor kaye baat ... due to several reasons mai net per kisai sai bai baat nahi kerte sawye webmasters ka. ya phir forums kaye hud tak rehte howi.
Aur na hai bewaqoof larkyon kaye tarah kisai ko tasver dekhaye ya fone no. diya. Albata mai na aik larka ko fone zaroro kia tha jis ka N ko B na batiya tha mere ase larka sai koye relation nahi hai coz he want to send his purpose. ( its a long story which i can't write).
agar kabhi pc use na kerwo aur woai lare ka mode mai ho toa kahte hai ka aaj anhai takyon sai baat nahi howi asee laye nasha tot raha hai ... ya asee kisam ka mukhtalif ilfas jis mai lafz dog zaroor shamil hota hai. ( aik bar chat room mai aik larkye na ya kaha tha ka mujhe call kerwo aur cell no diya tha mai na na toa ase call kaye lakin ase na sirf ya ilfaz perhe aur ase din ka baad sai ase kaye aik hai baat hai)
kabhi kahte hai ka mujhe yani A ko jo pasee milye hai (pass honi per) woai A ko kyon daye hai hume toa kabhi nahi daye jub ka mere parents na sawye aik bar ka kabhi kisai bache sai asee ka pass honi per jo pase juma hoti hai nahi laye.
Kabhi kahte hai baba ase ka laye master ka syllabus layine ja sakti hai lakin mere Snad nahi la sakti.
Pehle pehal net connection ko as ka dc kerna bai aik adat sai thai. (Bilawaja)
kabhi kahte hai tum badkardar ho. kabhi mere computer kaye devices ka noksan kerte hai like: mouse, keyboard, microphone. even mai apne hai ghar mai koye chez khawa woai mera suit ho ya jota nahi rakh sakti aisa ase ka behaviour sirf mere sath hai sub ka sath bai acha nahi hai but na toa woai anhai noksan dayite hai aur na hai gali .
Kabhi kahte hai A web sai pase kyon kamate hai kyon hai kabhi kahte hai A webdesigner kyno hai hala ka woai khud aik artist hai ase na FineArts mai Bacholar kia hai. phir kahte hai baba na A yani mujhe toa pc laye diya lakin humae kabhi koye aram ya asish nahi diya.
kabhi bhai ko kahte hai ka ase card nahi la ker do ya larkyon sai batye kerte hain kabhi maa ko kahte hai ka ya net per flirt kerte hai.
mere aik hai dost hai pehle jub woai fone kerte thai (abh nah kerte) asee kahe batmezi shoro ho jate thai agar fone dosre room mai laye jawo tub masla kahte hai apne dostyon sai baat kerne ho gaye na
Kabhi kahte hai nachwo . mojra kerwo ( i am sorry i don't want to use these words but she told me) jub mere baba ko heart attack howa tha mai na ase ya nahi kaha ka tumhare waja sai howa hai but asee shaid apne maa kaye pershani ka bai khial nahi tha. hospital ja ker her baat khud sai laga ker batate thai aur ase na ya baat bai maa ko tubhi kahe jub baba hospital mai thai.
Hath utha utha ker badda dayite hai kahte hai tumhara husband larkyon ka sath kharab ho ga. apne chezye khud tor ker mera naam laga dayite hai aur aisa hai aur bahat kuch asee kaye zuban ko agar mai bazari zuban kahwoye toa kuch galat nahi ho ga. mai ase ka hath kae bane howi chez nahi khate kyon ka ase per bai ase itiraz hai ka khud kaam nahi kerte.
Mai kaye bar maa baap ko kah shuki howi lakin her bar aik hai baat A tum chup ker jawo agar woa ache nahi hai toa. mai kaha kaha chup kerwoye itni sakhat ilfaz use woai kerte hai lakin mere maa asee sai mo toa aisa acha ker layite hai jisai mai na ase badua daye ho gali mai dayite howi woai nahi. N ka bagir toa kabhi khana nahi khate. sirf ase kaye khushii kaye khatir mere maa ka ya tarse amal sub bachyon ka sath hota hai. 4 salyon sai galiyae aur badye soynte aye rahe howi. Lakin phir bai mere maa N kaye baat per aksar oquat ase itibar kerte hai jisai mai hai jhoti howi. Woai mujhe nahi bolate thai ase ka dukh nahi tha mujhe lakin jub sai ase na ase kisam kaye batye kerna choro keraye hai mera dil cahta hai khudkoshi ker lo. kam az kam allah ka pass mujhe koye BADKARDAR kahne wala nahi ho ga.
N ko jo mai samjhte howi ya ase kaye adat hai ka her kaam mai apna naam kerna aur dosre ko nicha dekhana cahte hai. aur itna zor sai bolti hai ka sara mohala soynta hai.
abh mera masla N nahi balki mere maa baap hai (mere baap na mujhe aik bar ya bai kaha ka tum para la ker mere kanyon mai dal do jub ka mere toa koye galti bai nahi thai woai khudi bor bora rahe thai ya bai ase kay aik adat hai.)
mai jante howi N kaye shadi ho bai jaye tub bai woai hukmorani sai aztifa nahi dayina cahte. aur mai asee bakwas ka sath nahi jaye sakti ka yaha uthwo na baithwo na. woai kabhi nahi badal sakti ... baap zindage aur moo kaye kashmakash mai tha jub bai ase na khial nahi kia aur khial kerne wali kabhi BADKARDAR nahi kahte.
plz ap log islamic + medical point of view sai batye ka N ka kia masla hai aur mujhe kia kerna cahye . kia mujhe N sai shadi ka baad milna chaye ... mai shadi ka baad kisai sorat bai N sai milna nahi cahte woai mujhe dekh ker ase mo banate hai jisai nasor ko dekh liya ho. mere khial mai ase ya shock hai ka agar woa g kahe toa g kaho agar na kahe toa na kaho. logyon ko dekhane ka laye woai bare maan sai kahte hai ka A webdesigner aur marketer hai. mai toa kabhi kisai ka samne ase nahi kaha ka tum chup kerwo kyon ka tum mujhe nahi bolate. hala ka ase logyon ka bai koye khial nahi hai.
upper sai maa kahte hai agye ja ker pata nahi kia kerwo gaye. mujhe toa lagta hai mai kisai din waqi khudkoshi ker lon gaye.kabhi kabhar toa ammi abu kah dayite hai ka tumhare galti nahi hai lakin aksar hai abh ya baat soyne ko milti hai ka humae mar do.
N kaye ya adat hai ka woai oncha bool ker aur apne sai baat bana ker ya idhar udhar kaye batye ker ka dosre ko her haal mai khamosh kerwana cahte hai. woai 5 waqt kaye namazi hai her farz aur nafli ubadat kerte hai kabhi kabhii toa mujhe lagta hai mai khawab dekh rahe howi aik 5 waqt ka namazi itni galat zuban kisai use ker sakta hai.
mai tang aye chuki howi ya toa khushkoshi ker lon gaye werna waqi apne aap ko badkardar sabit ker don gaye.
Group: Active Members Joined: 13th Feb, 2007 Topic: 79 Post: 776 Age:
30
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 4:26am
Re: tanha
behna, aap nai kafi lengthy story bataee apni aur aap kafi tense bhi lag rahee hain.
first of all, khudkashi jaisay lafz kai baray main sochain bhi mat, yeh koi solution nahin balkay hamesha hamesha ka azab hai. yeh kaam buzdil kia kartay hain aur hamari muslim sisters buzdil nahin hain because islam tu hamain sabar ka dars daita hai aur hamain buhadir banata hai. ham koi lawaris log nahin hain, hamaray saath hamara Allah har waqt rehta hai jao sab kuch dekhta aur sunta hai. usay sab kai dilon ka haal pata hai.
aur aap nai kaha kai badkirdaar sabit kar doon gi, tu yeh koi baat nahin hue behna. agar aap ko koi gali deta hai tu aap kia usay sabit karnay kai liye tayyar ho jayen gai?? aisa bilkul bhi mat sochna, yeh life aap ki apni hai jo Allah ka aap ko gift hai, doosron kai kehnay sai insan waisa nahin ho jata. agar aap kuch aisa qadam utha bhi lain gi tu usay kia nuqsan ho ga. aakhirat tu aap ki kharab ho gi na.
behna, yeh life aik azmaish hai. aur phir behan bhaion ki larayan tu har ghar main hotee hain. jahan log aik saath itna arsa rehtay hon, wahan nok jhonk tu ho jatee hai, haan aap ki behan ki tabiyyat aur aadat ajeeb lag rahee hai laikin aap tu achi hain na. aur believe main achay logon ko kuch waqt kai liye problem zaroor paish atee hai laikin end result hamesha acha hota hai.
yeh tu Allah nai khud farmaya hai kai " Allah talah sabar karnay walon kai saath hai" agar unfortunately aap ko aisee kisi mushkil sai guzarna bhi par raha hai tu aap hoslay sai kaam lain aur in tamam baton ko Allah ki taraf sai azmaish samjhain.
aur aik aur baat, mujhay lagta hai kai kafi arsay ki laraee ki wajah sai ab aap ka mood bhi kharab rehta ho ga aur aap udaas udaas rehtee hon gi, parents sai bhi zaroorat kai waqt hi baat kartee hon gi. lets make some changes in life now on. jab bhi time milain maan ki khidmet karain, un kai saath hansain bolain, un kai pair dabaen, aur jaisay ho sakta hai un ki khidmet kia karain. baba bhi jab ghar aeen tu un sai piyar sai baat karain aur jaisay mumkin hon un ko khush rakhain. parents kai liye sari aulad barabar hotee hai. aap un ki beti hain. betion ki aur bhi fikar hotee hai. aap kisi ko dushman na samjhain. agar kisi aur ki adat theek nahin tu kia aap apni bhi kharab kar lain gi. aap mashAllah educated aur earning girl hain. education tu problems ko solve karnay ka shauur deti hai. jitnee bhi karwi baat ho ghar main us ko tahammul sa sunain aur samnay sai jawab mat dain balkay khamoshi ikhtiar kar lain aur kuch dair baad aram sai beth kar baat ko discuss karain, either with parents or with sister. agar aap piyar sai beth kai sister sai khud baat karain gi aur poochain gi kai woh aap sai kion naraz rehtee hai tu inshAllah pehli dafa nahin tu kuch din baad hi change aye ga. dekhain, I m not saying kai aap nainsafi bardasht karain, laikin piyar ka yeh tareeqa try tu kar kai dekhain, jahan koi baat had sai guzray apna point of view bataen, laikin sabr o tahammul sai jab doosra gussay main na ho. dekhain behan bhi aap sai bari hai aur parents bhi. aur baron ki izzat bhi karni parte hai aur apni marzi bhi batanee hai. so please try this. aap nai suna ho ga na "muhabbat fateh-e-aalim". I believe, jab aap behan sai apna samajh kar baat karain gi, tu aap kai aansoo us ka dil zaroor mom kar dain gai. InshAllah.
khoon kai rishtay kabhi toray nahin ja saktay. sirf kuch be aqli ki batain aap ko aik doosray sai door kar rahee hain. koi bhi baat jo ghar main sab kai samnay honee ho, us main doosron ko aitemad main laina chahiye. aap samajh gaee hon gi. aap ko apni behan samajh kar itna kuch kaha hai. kuch samajh na aye tu please dubara likhye ga.
MashAllah bohat lengthy story hai. or merey dost faisee nay bohat acha or detailed reply bi kia hai apko, mainy bi apni samajh bujh k mutabik kuchh likha hai wo b parh lain.
apka writing style dekh kar lagta hai k ap aik samajhdar larki ho, jo apna acha bura samajhnay ki salahiat rakhti hai.
ho sakta hai k bari behan shadi na honay ki waja say "chir chiri" ho chuki hai. usey tumhari help ki zaroorat hai, tum khud to net chalati ho or tumhari behan bore hoti rehti hai, uskay pas koi hobby nahi hai,sivaey larnay k, is liye wo apni hobby puri karti hai or tumhe bura lagta hai.
solution ye hai k jab bi net lagao, to usey bi sath bithha lia karo, usko sikhao kaisey bat kartay hain, koi achi websites dikhao, like cooking websites etc. jab usay khud bi shok ho jaeyga or pata lag jaey ga k tum kia karti ho to wo tumhe nai rokaygi. apni behan say kuchh sekho, jis mai wo expert hai, may be cooking.... ap ghar k kamo mai uska hath batao.
apki behan logo k samnay apki tareef bi karti hai, it means k uskay dil mai mohabbat hai.. thora soch kar batain k kia apnay bi kabi apni behan ki kisi k samnay tareef ki ???? yakeenan wo bi kisi na kisi kaam mai expert ho gi.
ye bi sochain k apki ma bi apkay khilaf hai, iski kia waja? theek hai behan to galat hai, lekin ma to akal mand hai.. ye bi apko pata hoga k jis ghar mai parents apni larki ko azadi detay hain, wahan larkion say nadani mai bohat galtian bi ho jati hain, or shayed yehi apki mother or sister nahi chahti k apkay sath kuch galat ho.
apki behan namz parhti hai, to kia ap bi namaz parhti ho???agar nai parhti to parhna shuru kar do.
apky andar itna gussa or itni nafrat hai k ap khudkushi or badkari bi karnay ka soch rahi hain,, jabkay dono batain islam k khilaf hain. ziada tar ba-wazu rehnay ki koshish karain, jab gussa ziada aye to dubrara wuzu karain or 2 nafl namaz parhain kuchh time Allah ki yaad mai guzarain or Allah say madad mangain, is yekeen k sath k Allah sab ki sunta hai. (yad rakhain apnay dua mangni hai, apnay ghar walo k liye bad-duain na mangnay lag jana warna kuch faida nai hoga, ulta apko hi nuksan ho jaega)
parents or family members ko bi itni ziada sakhti nahi kaRni chahiye k bachay samajhnay ki bajaey unsay naFrat hi kaRnay lag jaein. har bat pay rok tok koi bi nahi pasand kaRta.
Kia aap samjhte hai ka mai na kabhi solution ka laye baat nahi kaye toa ya galat hai her bar end ya hota hai ka woai inta shout kerte hai aur khud sai batye banane mai ase kadar mahir hai which i can't explain in words.
behan bhaion ki larayan tu har ghar main hotee hai zaroor hoti hai lakin waha kisai ka kardar ko khud sai banye howi miyar per judge nahi kia jata. her bar asee ignore kerte howi lakin agar kabhi aik baat bai kah do toa woai 2 ho jate hai aur aik agle (future aur past) kaye baat khud sai asee banate hai ka mere farishton aur shitanko bai nahi pata hota ka mai na kabhi ya shitane kaye thai
Mai ache nahi howi agar ache hoti toa maa baap ya na kahe ka tum larake ho shaid anh ka nazdik her haal mai g hai kahna cahye. mai toa phir porani batye bhola hai dayite howi lakin asee ka dil mai shaid nafrat kaye gahre shaid itni hai jitni sumandar kaye. kisai ka baap zindage aur moot kaye kashmakash mai ho toa bayte kabhi behan bhayon sai lare nahi kerte , bahir sai aye howi logyon ko tamasha nahi dekhate , maa jo pehle kaye tarah kaye pershanyon ka shikar hai asee khud sai fasane bana ker nahi soynate.
Asee logyon ko discuss kerne mai aik lutf atya hai. dosre lafzyon mai khaibat kerna. woai naflye aur farze her ibadat kerte hai lakin asee kaye zuban . blue area sai kuch kaam nahi hai
Kafi asra nahi 4 saal , 4 slayon mai shaid asee na mujhe 10 - 15 bar boliya ho ga . Ya baat nahi hai ka mere parents ka mode kharab her waqt rehta hai woai waqt ka sath theek ho jate hai aur keraye bai kia maa baap hai .. ulad toa shaid maa baap ko jhukana hai jante hai.
maa kaye khidmaat .. woai bai aik fasad hai waha bai N ko apna naam kerna hai baz oquat mere maa baap asee dantate bai hai ka tum her waqt guze mai rehte ho lakin asee shaid kisai ka khail nahi hai. baap ko toa woai jisia kuch samjhte hai nahi hai bakool asee ka humare baap na hume basic needs ka allawa kia diya hai. khawish asee kaye itni bare hai ka shaid agar niche dekhe toa dubara uthne ka khawab na rahe.
baba ka blood presure check kerne ka laye bai maa mintye ker ka late hai. Doc na baba ko chart sugar aur bp chart banaye ka laye kaha hai asee nahi pata ka mai copy per likh ker jawoye dr. kaye tarah nurse ( apne baap ) ko bata ker chale jate hai. jub ka logyon ko dekhane ka laye N agye agye hai.
Apne behnyon mai wahid howi jo ya nahi kahte ka baba na ya ker diya woai ker diya ya need pore nahi howi woai pore nahi howi.
N sai aram sai baat kerna 4 salyon mai momkin nahi howa toa abh kisai woai soyne gaye . woai jo maa baap ko khatir mai nahi late woai in - laws ka sath pata nahi kia keraye gaye. parents ka sath ya behan , bhai ka sath agar discuss kerwo toa kahte hai ka mere cogali ker rahe hai ya khud sai do batye bana ker comming fight mai batate hai.
agar mai asee apna na samjhwoye toa yakinan jitni financial noksan woai mujhe daye shuki hai asee asee ka jawab daye dayite mai na toa ase noksan nahi diya phir bai wohi baat ka tum batmez ho. tum baba kaye ladle ho kyon ka woai tumhe nahi dantate ( hala ka aisa nahi hai bus fark shaid ya hai ka asee her baat mai apna baap zahir lagta hai) kabhi kahte hai mujhe mardyon sai nafrat hai toa kabhi kuch.
Bakool ase ka mai baba kaye ladle howi kyon ka anhyon na mujhe pc laye ker diya jo kisai aur ko nahi laye ker dya asee baat bai nahi hai mere baba na N ko finearts mai graduation kerwaye hai aur finearts , computer studies sai ziyada expensve hai. fine arts brushes, esal, board, sheets ka kharacha toa baba dayite thai jub ka yaha A apne pocket money sai cds , net cards etc layite hai. mai na pakar ker toa apne kismat mai webdesignering aur internet marketing nahi lakhwye. ya toa aik mojsa tha jo mai by chance asee field mai aye gaye.
mere maa kia bolye woai shaid asee kaye zuban ka hathoyn khamosh ho jate hai. rahe baat baba kaye toa itni ache ulad hai ka baap asee ka hathyon rota hai ( aik aisa sakhas jo bare sai bare mushkil bardast ker layt hai woai agar ansoo bhaye sirf ulad ka hathoyn) kyon ka aik bayte dosre ko kahte hai tum Badkardar ho. moyt mange phir bai agar N ka dil naram nahi hota toa koye kia keraye.
asee na maa ka samne toa kaye bar kaha ka tum larkyon sai baat kerte ho , badkardar ho aur wagrah wagirah . lakin baap ka samne nahi kaha albata abh mere baba jante hai kyon ka ya baat anhyon na mere moo sai soyne hai. mai anhai hargis ya baat kahna nahi cahte thai. lakin jub mai na asee kaha ka mai toa quran per hath rakh ker kahne ko tiyar howi ka mai na ya nahi kaha ka baba ko heart attack N kaye waja sai howa toa jawab mai woai kahne lage mai bai quran utha ker kah sakti howi ka tum na ya kaha hai .
aur jub baba sola kerwa rahe thai tub bai ase ka guze mai rate barabar fark nahi ayiya. anhyon na mujhe kaha tum choti ho so tum mafe mang lo tub mai na asee kaha tha mujhe maaf ker do kyon ka mai badkardar howi. mai nahi cahte thai ka ya baat baba ko pata chale lakin abhi toa ya baat baba kaye moot kaye khawish per khatam ho gaye hai kal ko jub asee Z , A SAI shadi ka khawishmand payida ho ga tub toa asee kaye batye aur bai niklye gaye.
mai na toa kabhi Z Sai milne nahi gaye asee ka bahad israr ka bawajod kyon ka mai nahi cahte ka koye mere maa baap ko ya baat kaye aur wohi baat mere behan kah rahe hai. mai apne hasiyat use howi tissue paper kaye tarah nahi kerna cahte. mujhe sai toa N na aaj tak nahi pocuha ka tum na fone kia ya nahi N ko toa khud B na batiya tha. abh kaal ko asee asee baat per bai itiraz ho ga ka A sai shadi ka khawishmand kyon payida ho giya.
mera masla toa sirf ya hai ka mere maa N kaye khatir mujhe sai naraz kyon hoti hai ( kyon ka agar maa hum sai baat keraye yani A aur B sai toa N ko ase per bai itirz hai) aur mai asee asee kaye shadi tak bardast ker sakti howi shadi ka baad asee bardast nahi ker sakti aur na milna cahte howi waqte tor per milna kaye hud tak theek hai
N toa shaid waqti toor per bai milna nahi cahte mere baba na pakar pakar ker asee galiye lagne ko kaha tha tub ja ker kaye mintyon ka baad woai gale milye thai.
Dr. sahab kia ya koye mental problem hai. mere khial mai toa woai khud aisa kerte hai shaid woai cahte hai ka jo ase ka pass nahi woai kisai ka pass bai na ho. aur jo aseee ka passs hai woai bai kisai aur ko dayina nahi cahte.
dosti toa waha hoti hai jaha koye kisai kaye shakel dekh ker apne moo ka bilawaja design bana ker kharab na keraye ya moo mai bor borana na shoro keraye . asee ka ya behaviour sub ka sath hai lakin mere sath kuch ziyada hai bakool asee ka mai ladli bayte howi.
MashAllah bohat lengthy story hai. or merey dost faisee nay bohat acha or detailed reply bi kia hai apko, mainy bi apni samajh bujh k mutabik kuchh likha hai wo b parh lain.
ho sakta hai k bari behan shadi na honay ki waja say "chir chiri" ho chuki hai. usey tumhari help ki zaroorat hai, tum khud to net chalati ho or tumhari behan bore hoti rehti hai, uskay pas koi hobby nahi hai,sivaey larnay k, is liye wo apni hobby puri karti hai or tumhe bura lagta hai.
wase toa woai shoro sai hai asee hai apne har na manye wali. asee mere toa kia kisa kaye bai help kaye zaroorat nahi hai bakol ase ka woai kisai kae help nahi layite apna kaam khud ker sakti hai.
for ur kind info. i started using internet in 2004 and i told them to use it .. tub toa asee pc zahir lagta tha .... fahashi lagte thai .. jub ka koye phone call ya chat room ka shakar bai nahi tha.
woai bore nahi hoti ... bakol ase ka .. asee ghar ka kaam kerne ka ase laye shock hai kyon ka woai aik hukmarani cahte hai hala ka ammi , baba , behan bhai sub karor bar mana kerte hai .. piyar sai , dant sai ...
woai na sirf aik ache artist hai bulki ache dress designer bai hai ... agar mujhe pore family webdesigner kaye hasiyaat sai jana jata hai toa asee mujhe sai bai pehle aik ache painter, designer kaye hasiyat sai jana jata hai.
mujhe bora asee laye lagta hai kyn ka mai ase karor bar kah shuki howi ka jawo aur baba ko bata do kyon nahi batate tub kyon khamosh ho jate hai.
aap ke problem ka wahid solution shadi hai, aap allah par bharosa rakhen aur us se dua karen ke woh aap ko en halaat se nikal de. apne aap par tars khana chor den, apni zindagi ka ek maqsad banaen aur har tarah ke negative khayalaat apne zahen se nikal den, jab aap ki sisters aap se larai karen to aap un ko bilkul ignore karen aur aesa behave karen ke jese ghar mai sirf aap aur ap ke maa baap rehte hain, un ko bilkul apni life se nikal den, kuch din bad woh khud hi lar lar kar thak jaye gi aur aap ko tang nahi karege.
1st na toa mai apne per tars khate howi aur dosra jante howi ka mujhe kia kerna hai . but ya baat mere bus sai bahir kaye hai 4 saal sai aik hai baat .. pata nahi mai na aisa koyn sa gunah ker diya hai .
ms. khubsorat i have my aim of life ... which very rare female have and i know how to fulfill my aim ... but everytime she wants to spread throns in my ways.
3 saal pehle hai woai mere life sai nikal chuki hai aur aksar mai asee ignore hai kerte howi lakin agar bahat bara noksan ker daye toa ya koye tariqa toa nahi ka tub bai mai ziyate bardast kerwoye . even sometimes woai bol rahe hoti hai toa mujhe nahi pata hota kia bol rahe hai kyon ka mai kaan band ker layite howi ( use to ho shuki ho shaid asee laye)
thakan aur lare sai woai bai woai larki jo 4 salyon mai ache bore halat mai nahi badle .. umeed per duniya kayim hai
baba moot ka moot sai wapis aye gaye . anhai 28 dinwoye mai asee kae nature mai rate barabar bai fark nahi ayiya ... maa financial aur zindage kaye taraf sai pershan ho aur bayte ya kahe gaye ka fala ya kerta hai fala woai kerta hai jo kisai na kia bai na ho..
abh toa mujhe lagta hai jisai woai her waqt aik bariyane apne mind mai pakate rahte hai ka fala kaye baat ka remix ya nikalwoy gaye.
as far as shadi concern:
toa aak kaal bahat kaam log shadi larki kaye sirf naiksirat dekh ker kerte hai pehle maa baap ka woai bank balance dekhawo jo larki ko jahiz kaye sorat mai milaye ga.
mere maa tang aye shuki hai ase ya kah kah ker ka safyon mai tum na apne skin kharab ker laye hai sub apna kaam khud keray ga tub woai kyon nahi soynte woai just apne per tars khate hai
solution ye hai k jab bi net lagao, to usey bi sath bithha lia karo, usko sikhao kaisey bat kartay hain, koi achi
websites dikhao, like cooking websites etc. jab usay khud bi shok ho jaeyga or pata lag jaey ga k tum kia karti
ho to wo tumhe nai rokaygi. apni behan say kuchh sekho, jis mai wo expert hai, may be cooking.... ap ghar k kamo mai uska hath batao.
ta kaye agar mere izat thore sai rah gaye hai toa woai bai uter ker hath mai daye daye. woai pata nahi kin larkyon ko gali dayite hai ... hath waha batate hai jaha koye apne sath kisai ko saltanat ka prince na sahi toa sahzada hai maan laye. woai maa aur Bko nahi bardast kerte toa mujhe kaha keraye gaye mai toa wase bai batmez howi
apki behan logo k samnay apki tareef bi karti hai, it means k uskay dil mai mohabbat hai.. thora soch kar batain k
kia apnay bi kabi apni behan ki kisi k samnay tareef ki ???? yakeenan wo bi kisi na kisi kaam mai expert ho gi.
maybe aap sahi kah rahe ho ka asee ka dil mai love hai .. lakin tub asee ka dil naram kyon nahi hota jub maa baap mintye kerte hai ka sula ker lo .tub bai A hai pehal kerte hai A toa matye per shikan nahi late aur asee kaye tiwar nahi badalte.
mai na kabhi kisai ka samne lare nahi kahe hamisha khamosh ho jate howi ka bahir ka log toa tamasha dekahe gaye .. mithe mithe batye keraye gay aur baad mai apne comments daye gaye jisai gibat kahte hai lakin asee kisa ka bai lihas nahi hai .. abhi ya haal hai toa shadi ka baad jub saas , nand aur sub ko soyna ho ga tub pata nahi kia keraye gaye.
ye bi sochain k apki ma bi apkay khilaf hai, iski kia waja? theek hai behan to galat hai, lekin ma to akal mand hai..
mere maa ka mode phir sare ulad sai kharab ho jata hai agar sub baki 3 behan bhai akatye bathe hai toa N sahiba farmate hai mere bore ker rahe hai .. jo hume pata bai nahi hota aur phir sikhwo pokar ker ka apna per tars kha ker 10 - 12 din moo bana ker N g theek hoti hai. phr wohi baat 14 din .
mutlab ya tha ka woai her tarah kaye ubadat kerte hai lakin zuban asee kaye blue area sai kaam nahi lagte ....
hirat hai mujhe ka guza mere undar hai jo phir bai jhok jate hai aur woai jo apne aap ko aik shitan samjhte hai
mujhe allah per bahat yakin hai aur kismat per bai ka honi ko koye taal nahi sakta . mai na kabhi apne ghar walyon ka laye bore dua nahi mange albata mere behan khuli sare aum badye dayite hai .
ye bi apko pata hoga k jis ghar mai parents apni larki ko azadi detay hain, wahan larkion say nadani mai bohat galtian bi ho jati hain, or shayed yehi apki mother or sister nahi chahti k apkay sath kuch galat ho.
pehle baat mere maa baap na apne kisai ulad ko bai bilawaja azadi nahi daye shaid hai ap na koye ase larki dekhaye howi jo social activity , shopping , hoteling kaye bajye ghar mai rahna pasand kerte ho.
dosra mere ammi Z ko nahi jante . tisra agar behan ko itni humdardi hai toa asee na kabhi ya kyno nahi pocuha ka tum na fone kia tha ya nahi ( kyon ka ase na mujhe nahi dekha ase b na batiya tha aur B na bai mujhe nahi dekha ase na sirf ya dekha ka A kafi dare fone per khamosh rahe then 5 min baad aik call aye jis na ya kah ker band ker diya ka asee Ali sai baat kerne hai ..
woai muhabaat tub kaha chale jate hai jub kisai sai sawal kerne kaye bajye khud sai estimate kia jata haii . B aur N nahi jante ka mai ya baat jante howi ka B na N ko fone ka batiya coz mai dosre room mai thai aur bychance mai na conversation soyn laye.
mai agar bare nahi toa choti bai nahi aur na hai itni bewaqoof howi ka koye sweets kaye lalash daye ker finger pakre aur mai chal don .
mai na toa Z ko fone kerna cahte thai lakin ya story her kisai sai mukhtalif hai . na toa asee mai maa baap kaye ignorance hai aur na Z kaye koye khas baat.
bus ya hai ka jo hona hota hai woai ho ker rahta hai ... mai asee ka bahad izrar ka bawjod even woai mujhe full granty ,security daye raha hai ka bawjod nahi mili sirf maa baap kaye khatir , behnyon kaye khatir jin ka in-laws kaal ko anhai tana na dyae. apne khatir ka kaal ko mai husband sai jhot na bol sakwoye .. dil mai mell na ho..
aur asee laye kyon ka use howi tissue paper mai aur larki mai phir koye khas fark ya society nahi layite .. larka ko maaf ker dayit hai ya bhol jate hai . whatever...
na toa mai na Z ka mamlye mai pehle din maa baap ko nikala tha aur na Z na. mai Z ko ya tak kah shuki howi ka agar tum mujhe na milne per blackmail kerne kaye dhamki bai do tub bai mai tum sai nahi milwoye gaye kyon ka mai apne maa baap ka jota kha sakti howi tumahre nahi . aur kia kahwoye.
N ka zahin mai her waqt aik fasad pakta rahta hai agar ase itiraz tha fone per ya jo kuch bai toa ase chaye ka maa baap ko batye kyon nahi batate jub mai nahi darte toa woai kyon darti hai. kyon ka mai jante howi ka fone mahaz itifak tha ya mojsa , mojsa kisai tha woai waqt anhai per mere maa baap ko khud hai pata chal jaye ga .
i have query to dr. is it seem some mental desease.
sometimes mujhe lagta hai ka woai asee nahi hai lakin bilawaja pal pal bor borane aur blah blah na asee ka zahin ko abh pagal ker diya ga aur abh woai her waqt yahi souchte hai.
subhi ka sath aisa behave hai mere sath kuch ziyada hai hai
Group: Active Members Joined: 13th Feb, 2007 Topic: 79 Post: 776 Age:
30
Posted on:20th Aug 2007, 6:27pm
Re: tanha
I have read all your detailed replies, and last suggestion I have that always be positive and just belief on Allah that since you are doing everything good to everyone so Allah will never disappoint you. always try to be relaxed and as I told you before this is test of your patience and you have to be successful. offer prayers regularly. I am sure aap buhut innocent and naik larki hain aur us ghuttan zada mahol sai nikalnay kai liye betab hain. aap nai bataya kai aap kai perents bhi theek nahin rehtay, un kai zehan main sab batain hain. aap ki sister bhi kuch complex ka shikhar hain. is sab soorat e haal main aap ko positive reh kar apna time guzarna hai. InshAllah aap ka future buhut acha ho ga. aur aap nai us larkay Z kai baray main theek kia, jab tak parents rukhsat na karain shadi kai baad, koi qadam bhi khud na uthaye ga. aap samjhdar larki hain, inshAllah sab theek ho jaye ga, apnay aap ko ghar kai flow kai saath rakhain, agar koi aap sai baat karta hait tu theek nahin karta tu aap bhi na karain. you know the better situation of your home.
last suggestion that I can say is just again be positive, offer prayers and dont take anything on to ur nerves. Allah aap ki life main asanian ata farmaye. ameen
i am feeling you are in a deep trouble. i hope k mujsay ziada acha mashwara kuchh or log bi apko daingay.........but sister dont feel tanha, and dont feel hesitation, say your mother to find a nice man for you to marry or agar ap already kisi ko pasand karti ho to apni mother ko bato k mai shadi kaRna chahti hon.bcoz in my opinion shadi is the only solution or agar shadi k baad apka susral mai bi kisi na kisi waja say jhagra ho gaya susral k logo say, to un logo say jhagra karnay ki bajaey ye pata laganay ki koshish kaRna k ap mai wo konsi khami hai jisay log napasand/ikhtalaaf kartay hain.......... and I can only pray for you.. Allah apki madad karay...
pata nahi mujhe toa lagta hai jo mai hai pagal howi jubhi her bar shor sharaba kerne wale dosryon ko jhota kerte hain ... any ways thanks for taking the time for helping me .... only one solution i found .... khamosh raho khawa N A kA gala hai kyon tak daye.
faisee: abhi toa Z ka koye issue nahi hain jub ho ga tub asee asee per bai itiraz ho ga ka asee koye blah blah kyon mil giya
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Social Problem: My Sisters Misbehave With Me
Re: tanha
re: faisee
re: josh and faisee