danialahad |
Group: Members Joined: 10th Nov, 2007 Topic: 12 Post: 31 Age:
31
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 2:10am |
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Mother and Wife.
Hello, Yeh may be app ke liye koi chota mota masla ho lakin mein bohat hassas hoon or mujhe lag raha hai ke koi issue na ho jaiey. Meri biwi pehli dafa shaadi ke baad maikey gaiey hai and wo mujhe se expect ker rahi hai ke mein usse lene jaoon ga. Jab ke meri Ammi mujhe na jane ka keh rahi hain or mere chotey bhai ko bhje rahi hai usse lene ke liye.. Ab meri wife mujh se keh rahi hai ke mein lene aaooo ga tu wo ayee gi kiyoon ke pehli dafa hai. jab ke meri ammi mujhe jane nahi de rahi.. Shoro mein hi mein eik typical situation mein phans raha hoon. Koi assan sa hal bata do yaroo.. hassnaa mat..
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sunny007 |
Group: Members Joined: 22nd Dec, 2007 Topic: 44 Post: 4216 Age:
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 6:31am |
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danialahad dear agar sirf wife ko lane ki baat hai, to behter hoga k aap khud jaa kar us ko le aaien,
aur agar elders ka personal maamla hai, to main to yahi kahoonga dear k aap gaie kaam se.
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azzi |
Group: Members Joined: 15th Oct, 2008 Topic: 4 Post: 288 Age:
42
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 9:43am |
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danialahad Danial hamesha jo right par ho uska sath den, aap ki wife ki jaez demand hai, aap apni ammi ko convicen karen. Maan ko manana koee mushkil kaam nahin. aor aap ko apni wife ko lene jana chahiye. |
Kali Zuban |
Group: Members Joined: 19th Sep, 2010 Topic: 29 Post: 1792 Age:
28
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 12:08pm |
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re: wife and mother yeh tu nahi keh sakte keh aap apni walda ki baat na maane, lekin yeh haqeeqat hai keh aap ki waldah ghalat kar rahi hai. aap ko bivi ko laane ke liye jaana chahiye.
aap walda ko qail kare keh woh aap ko jaane se na roke, agar woh na maane tu apni family ke kisi aur member ke zaria walda ko qail kare keh woh aap ko jaane se na roke.
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sunny007 |
Group: Members Joined: 22nd Dec, 2007 Topic: 44 Post: 4216 Age:
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 3:58pm |
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danial dear danial
aap ko khud ja kar apni wife ko le aana chahie, agar walida mana karti hai to ghalat karti hai, ya shaied es k peeche koi aur kahani hai, kia aap explain kar sakte hain k aap ki walida aisa q karna chahti hain? |
Sami144 |
Group: Members Joined: 10th Jun, 2008 Topic: 13 Post: 546 Age:
37
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 4:47pm |
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bhae agr to aap ki Love marriage hay to aap ko har hal main apne parents ko itmad main le kar hi chalna chahye. aur agr aap ki arrange marriage hay to aap jaldi se ja kar ja kar apni wife ko le aen. lakan dono soorton main aap khud hi jaen.
hamari socity main aksar parents apne bachoon ko social black mail karte hain. yani mom ji kahen gi tum sirf meri hi bat mano. apni BV ka khyal kam rakho. sochne ki bat ye hay keh jab hamare parents khud os girl ko pasand kar k late hain to shadi k baad osi k sath itni zid bazi kyun hoti hay. os bechari ka kya qasoor hota hay, jo apne parents aur behn bhaon ko chhor kar ati hay.
mere zati khayal main housband ko har hal main apni BV ka sath dena chahye. agr aap ki wife suchhi hay aur parents kehte hain keh "parents ya BV main se ek chun lo" to aap ko BV chooze karni chahye.
aur agr aap ki BV Jhooti ya galt hay aur wo kehti hay keh "parents ya BV main se ek ko chun lo" to aap BV ko kuchh dinon k ley ekela chhorh den, I believe os aqal thakane aa jae gi. |
Veer |
Group: Members Joined: 12th Oct, 2011 Topic: 85 Post: 4718 Age:
30
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 5:26pm |
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danialahad agreed with kali zuban
ya bather yehi hai ke aap apni mother ke sath khud he lene chale jaye maybe es tarha woh maan jaye. |
Seemi |
Group: Members Joined: 11th Sep, 2007 Topic: 14 Post: 3829 Age:
27
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Posted on:22nd Nov 2008, 9:54pm |
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danial Discuss this matter politely with your mother. Why she is preventing you? Discuss and convice her that you are newly wed and now your wife is your responsibility. Aap ki wife ki demand bilkul valid hai, or yeh aik riwayat hai k biwi ko us ke husband hi lenay k liye aatay hien. Aap ki wife ki bhi kuch expectations hoon gi, jo aap ko poori karni chahiye.
May be aap ki ammi yeh soch rahi hoon k aap pehli dafa lenay jayein ge to yeh lagay ga k husband biwi k qaboo mein hia or etc etc... lekin aisi koi baat nahin hoti. Yeh bhi ho sakta hai k aap ka chouta bhai agar lenay jaye to aap ki wife us k saath anay se hi inkaar kar de ya un k parents apni baiti ko bhaijnay se hi inkaar kar dein. or is tarah aik chouti si aat barh kar fasd ki shakal ikhtiyar kar sakti hai.
Is mamlay mein apnay father or baqi elder brothers sisters ko bhi confidence mein lein or beth kar is ka positive solution nikalein jo k yehi hia k aap ko apni wife ko lenay khod jana chaiye. Agar aap ki mother bhi sath jayein to or bhi achi baat hai.
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Raja Taqi |
Group: Members Joined: 17th Sep, 2010 Topic: 29 Post: 1940 Age:
47
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Posted on:23rd Nov 2008, 12:25am |
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Danial sb. A.O.A
ye aap ki naee life k ibtidaee din hein aap ko yahan her baat ko soch ker chulna chahye,ubi aap ki shadi ko siraf 2-4 din hi huway aur ye bi aik issue bun giya.
aik turaf aap ki wife ki ye soch k mujy aap hi leny aein...aur doosri turaf aap ki walida ki ye soch k ussay aap nahi leny jao gay.....iss se ye zahir hota he k wo 2no hi aik doosry ko shuroo mein hi accept nahi ker rahein.
aur ye wo hi aag he jo julti hi jay gi aur iss ki lupaite mein aap ki hunsti khailti zindgi agy chall ker jull ker reh jay gi...
aap apni walida ko aur wife 2no ko nuram joee se conveince kerein aur unein ye sumjany ki koshesh kerein k ye to koi issue nahi he apni anna ka musla bunany k liye....aur koshesh kerty rahein k ibtidaee dinoon mein hi in 2no mein mohabat pedha kerein ta.. k..aap apni ugli zindgi pur sakoon guzar sukein...
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azad73 |
Group: Members Joined: 25th Oct, 2008 Topic: 6 Post: 49 Age:
38
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Posted on:23rd Nov 2008, 1:30am |
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Danial sb aap ke ammi jo bol rehe ha galat ha likan man man hote ha aap us ko samjy k islam mein 1 gurt ka ly bager muharm khe jana mana ha agar aap ka chota bahe na baleg ha tu o muharm nhe hosakta awr agar bara ha tu matlab baleg ha tu tu 1 dewar muharm nhe hoskta shaid mmi man jayege agr ammi islam pasand ha |
danialahad |
Group: Members Joined: 10th Nov, 2007 Topic: 12 Post: 31 Age:
31
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Posted on:23rd Nov 2008, 4:44am |
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Thanks every one Finally conclusion tu yeh hai ke mujhey khud hi jana chahiey tha. Lakin ab bhai ja chuka hai or meri wife uss ke saath hi wapis aa rahai hai.
Story behind the scene yeh hai ke although shaadi tu mere ammi ki merzi se hoi hai yani arrange marraige lakin mere walid ki death ke baad mere saath unn ki attachement bohat ziada hai iss liye wo mere bare mein bohat ziada possessive hain.
Shaadi ke 2 din baad hi meri walida ki halat bohat kharab ho gai unn se mera share hona bardashat nahi hoa and she went to almost hestaria condtion. Dum wagaira karwaya tu pata chala ke nazar ya jado wagaira ke assrat bhi hain. Lakin uss dum ke baad haalat kafi behtar hain. Ab mein khud hi ammi ke samne wife se reserve rehne ki koshis karta hoon take ammi ko mental satisfaction rahey.
Ab wife ko na lene jana bhi issi silsilay ki kari hai. Pata nahi yeh sahi ker raha hoon yan nahi lakin I love madly to my mother and i cannot see her sad any how.
wife ki samjhaya hai ye condtion or wo cooprate tu kar rahi hai laikin ghar waloon se thora khichi khichi si hai yani iss condition mein naturaly adjust nahi ho paa rahi.
Please pray for me abhi 2 hafte hi hoey hain or yeh typical condition shoro ho gaiee hai. Please also provide me your advice in this respect.
Regards
Danial
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sunny007 |
Group: Members Joined: 22nd Dec, 2007 Topic: 44 Post: 4216 Age:
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Posted on:23rd Nov 2008, 5:00am |
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danial i'll alway pary for u and hope forum members will do so,
lekin aap ki wife ko itni jaldi maike nahi jana chahie tha,
khair ab jo howa so howa, aagey se aap ihtiat karo k jo haqooq walidain k hain aur jo haqooq wife ki hain, un main aitidal karo aur un ko b samjane ki koshish karo k ye Allah ka hukum hai
Insha Allah sab teek ho jaiega |
danialahad |
Group: Members Joined: 10th Nov, 2007 Topic: 12 Post: 31 Age:
31
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Posted on:24th Nov 2008, 3:21am |
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Is it sycological problem..? Dear all,
Mera masla terha hota jaa raha hai. As i have told earlier that after marraige i feel that my mother is very much possessive about me. Shaadi ke dosre hi din unn ka mazaag badal gaya tha and she didnt accepted her baho or my wife. Halanke yeh shaadi unn ki marzi se hoi hai or arranged hai.
Pehley hafte tu unnhu ne raat ko hamare ikhate sone per bohat ziada gusse ka izhar kia. or ghar chorne ka kehne lagi or roi bhi bohat. Mujhe ye sab abnormal laga shuk hoa ke yeh koi jado wagaira hai. iss liey dum wagaira karwaya. Jin shah sahib se dum karwaya unnho ne kaha ke kissi ne amal kia hai. khair mein ziada tu nahi manata in batoo ko lakin dumm ka asar hoa or peechle poore hafte mein wo theek thaak takreeban 80-90% normal rahi.
Kal jab my wife returen , tu raat tu ammi ne had ker di. wo humain raat ko khirki se chup chup ker dekhti rahi. phir unn ke purani condition wapis aa gaee or unhu ne rona or galiya deni shoro ker dien, meri wife ko bura bhala kehna shoro ker dia . or phir kehne lagi ke yeh sab kuch mere bas mein nahi mein ghar chor don gi. Mujehy jab yeh sab pata chal tu bohat afsoos hoa or mujhey lag raha hai ke waqaee koi amal wagaira ka asar hai ya phir koi sycological porblem hain.
Serniors and doctors plz tell me what should i do in this situation. Koi acha se sycatrist ka bhi bata dain lahore mein jo ke iss issue ko address ker sake. Or mujhey kia kerna chahehiey..
Regards
Danial Lahore.
[email protected]
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zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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Posted on:24th Nov 2008, 3:33am |
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danial very sad yar
ap ki kmotehr per waqai koi jadoo hai
un per aur apne ghar mein bhi erhai wagera kerwayen
aur sath hi unhen achey psychatrist ki bhi zaroorat hai
is situation mein to apki mother ap ki baton ko nahi samjhyen gi...balke un ko ap k pyar ki zaroorat hai aur ap ki wife k bhi pyar ki zaroorat hai
ap apni wife ko hi samjhayn k wo bemar hain...mentally disturb hain ....sari situation unhen samjhayn..wo agar samajhdar huin to ap ka is meiin stah zaroor deyn gi....
dont worry...apni wife ko aitamad men leyn aur usye pyar se smjhayen aur usey batayen k ap us se kitna pyar kerteyn ahin ....
larki ko sirf husband k pyar, care aur respect ki zaroorat hoti hai...ye sub usey mil jaye to weo baki sub bardasht ker leti hai.... |
saahilbhai |
Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 971 Age:
28
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Posted on:24th Nov 2008, 5:24am |
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agreed with zeb danial bhai app ki problem sun kar bauhat afsoos hua Allah Tala app ki mushkil har farmaye zeb bhai ne bilkul theek kaha app apni wife se baat kare un ko samjhayen aur apni mother se pyaar se paish aye aur jald se jald un ko kisi pshycologist ko dikhaye kyo k mere khayal se app ki mother pshyco patient ho gaye hain Allah app ki mother ko jald theek kardega Inshallah |
saahilbhai |
Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 971 Age:
28
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Posted on:24th Nov 2008, 5:24am |
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agreed with zeb danial bhai app ki problem sun kar bauhat afsoos hua Allah Tala app ki mushkil hal farmaye zeb bhai ne bilkul theek kaha app apni wife se baat kare un ko samjhayen aur apni mother se pyaar se paish aye aur jald se jald un ko kisi pshycologist ko dikhaye kyo k mere khayal se app ki mother pshyco patient ho gaye hain Allah app ki mother ko jald theek kardega Inshallah |
zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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Posted on:25th Nov 2008, 2:31am |
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danial ji batayie
kuch ferk para apki mother k behavior mein
bhai thora time agey ga
bus ap hamari advices per amal kijiye |
danialahad |
Group: Members Joined: 10th Nov, 2007 Topic: 12 Post: 31 Age:
31
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Posted on:26th Nov 2008, 1:58am |
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Zeb and Others. Brothers meri pereshani bharti ja rahi hai.
Aik or baat hai wo yeh ke shaadi se pehley mein iss shaadi ke liey raazi nahi tha lakin appni sister or mother ke bohat ziada emotional pressure ki waja se mein tayar tu ho gaya or ab shaadi ke baad mein normal rehna chahta hoon.
Lakin ab meri ammi ko larki yani meri wife passand nahi aa rahi. or wo saaf saaf meri wife ko bata rahi hain, ke shaadi se pehley mein ussse passand nahi kerta tha .
Meri ammi ko eik pichtawa sa hai, ke unnhu ne mere liye sahi wife nahi select ki. or iss lieye bhi woh affsurda hain.
Subha meri wife ne breakfast begair nahaey bana dia tu ammi ki condition phir se kharab ho gai or wo cheekhne lag gai . or rone lag gaiye hain ke unnho ne galati ker di meri shaadi uss se karwa ker. Or yeh ke abb mera kuch nahi baney ga yani mera koi mustakbil nahi hai or wo mujhe chor ker chali jaieyn gi.
Mein iss sari situation mein bilkul mind kho chuka hoon . mujhey kuch samajh nahi aarahi ke kia karoon. office bhi nahi ja pa raha kam bhi nahi ho raha. tankhwa nahi mill rahi iss lieye mali masle hone ke bhi chances hain.
Please pray for me and tell me should I go to sycatrist if yes then which one.
Regards
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zeb |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Aug, 2007 Topic: 114 Post: 13610 Age:
32
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Posted on:26th Nov 2008, 2:26am |
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danial dear bro...ap ko to main ne pehle hi akha tha k ap apni mother ko kisi aalim k sath sath kisi ache psychatrist ko bhi dikhayen....ap k city mein jo sub se acha ho usey dikhayen....
aur main ne ap se ye bhi kaha tha k ap apni wife se is barey mein bat keryen aur unhen samjhayen k wo un ki motehr ko pyar se handle kiya keryen aur un ko ye samjhayen k wo jo bhi kuch kehti hain un ki baton ko mind na kiya keryen aur dil per na liya keryen...bus ek akan se suneyna ur dusrey se nikal deyn bcoz wo bemar hain aur is haalat mein insan ko kuch pata nahi chalta k wo kia ker rha hai
dear main ye sub is liye ekh rha hun bcoz mere is tarahn k patients se pala per chuka hai aur main ne khud bht se aise cases dekhey hain....so dont worry...main apko apne experience k bina per mashwaray de raha hun aur is mein ghabranay wlai bat nahi hai...aise mareezon ko time lagta hai but wo atlast thik ho hi jatey hain....but the major thing k aise mareezon k stah bht pyar se rehna perta hai aur medicines time per deni perti hain...
to ap ab time zaya na keryen aur jitni jaldi ho sakey mother ko kisi achey psychatrist ko dikhayen aur apni wife ko samjhaayn k wo ap ka sath deyn....
ek aur bat mujhey samajh nahi aa rahi...k ap ki mother aur apki sis ne apni marzi se apki shaid ki...to ap ki sis ka ab kia role hai????? kia wo mother ko pyar se nahi samjhatin k kia ho gya hain unehn??? shadi to marzi se gi thi to ab unhen kia ho gya ahi???? ab unehn apki wife kion buri lagnay lagi hai???? is ki koi na koi khas waja to zaroor hai jo ap nahi bata rahey hamen.... |
saahilbhai |
Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 971 Age:
28
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Posted on:26th Nov 2008, 2:42am |
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agreed to zeb bhai brother app apni ammi ko jitni jaldi ho sake kisi psyco specialist ko mein bhi iss tarha k patient ko dekh chuka hoo personal experience hai, isse theek hone mein time to lagta hai magar Inshallah app ki mother theek ho jayenge app plz jald kisi psyciatrist se consult karo, |
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