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Zeyaul |
Group: Members Joined: 07th May, 2012 Topic: 1 Post: 2 Age:
20
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| Posted on:7th May 2012, 12:37pm |
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 Assala mo alaikum
ap se guzarish hai ki aap hume kuch aisi baten bataen jis se hum our hamara iman bhi qayam rahe. yahan tak to me janta hon ki yeh sex problam site hai lekin hamara yah farz bhi banta hai ki hum kuch quran our hadis ke roshni me batae ki love marrige our arrange marrige me ki farque hai. me apke jawab ka muntakhab hon. khuda hafiz..!
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simaab |
Group: Members Joined: 07th May, 2012 Topic: 1 Post: 2 Age:
21
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| Posted on:8th May 2012, 2:50pm |
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w salam aap koi acha topic shoeon karen hum us par achi baten karen gey...
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myrizvi |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 107 Post: 5686 Age:
53
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| Posted on:13th May 2012, 5:36am |
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islam aur love 1. islam kahta hai k pahlay marriage karo aur oskay baad mankooha say g bhar k love karo. mankoohah say love karna Allah aur oskay Rasool saw ka hukm hai. iss tarah yeh hukm maannay say sawab bhi milta hai. yani biwi say piyar mohabbat ka bhi sawaab hai
2. dunya maiN raaij ... love marriage ... say moraad yeh hai k pahlay ap kissi naa.mahram laRki say love karo aur woh apkay love k meyaar par poori nah otray to ossay choR kar kissi aur say love karo... yakay baad degaray love kartay jaa'o...aur jab koi laRki apkay meyaar par poora otar jaa.ay to oss say shadi bhi karlo .... love marriage maiN pahlay aik naa.mahram say love kia jata hai...love affairs chalaya jata hai, oss say milna milana hota hai aur oskay baad...agar donouN satisfied howay to shadi ki jati hai...yeh islam k khilaaf hai
3. arange marriage...islamic taleem k ain otabiq hai...yani jab shadi karni ho tab rishtah DhoonDa jata hai...chaahay khood dhoonDaiN ya parents... aur rishtah pasand aa jaa.ay to shadi karli jati hai...jab rishtah pasan aa jaa.ay both families ko to islam yeh allow karta hai k laRka aur laRki bhi nikaah say pahlay aik doosray ko dekh laiN, parents ki maujoodgi maiN aik doosray sya bata cheet kar laiN...
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maham shah |
Group: Members Joined: 02nd Mar, 2012 Topic: 4 Post: 49 Age:
27
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| Posted on:13th May 2012, 1:41pm |
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shadi se dar topic bohat acha hai. par main thora arrange marriages k khilaaf ho gai hu apne tajrbay ki wja se. ab to mujy shadi se he dar lgnay lga hai. shadi achi cheez nahi hai. shohar bhi apna nahi bntaa. main is se ziada kuch nai keh skti ,,,,,,,,rona a rha hai |
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fahad hussain khan |
Group: Members Joined: 26th Apr, 2012 Topic: 0 Post: 178 Age:
23
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| Posted on:13th May 2012, 9:56pm |
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maham shah ji Walikum salam par main ap se agree nh karta is bat se k love wale ache hote hai pairs kamyab jte hai yehe matlb hai na ap ka. Meri bh arrange marraige hai par ALLAH k kram se bht kamyab ja rahe hai. Marrage chahe love k ho ya arrange.yea mian bewi p depend karta hai k wo is rishte ko kis had tak our kaha tk nibha pate hain. |
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myrizvi |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 107 Post: 5686 Age:
53
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| Posted on:13th May 2012, 11:42pm |
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shadi say Dar
maham shah!
mujhay apkay talkh tajarbay par afsos hai. Allah apko sakoonay qalb ataa karay aur zindagi ki khooshiyaaN day aameen
maham, ap to aik paRhi likhi khatoon haiN aur aik ostaad bhi. yeh apsay zeyadah behtar kaun jaanta hoga k zaati tajarbah aur zaati aqal aik alag cheez hai aur ijtemayee daanish aik alag cheez. aur insab say baRh kar insaanouN kay khaaliq ka farmaan hai.
agar koi shakhs car chalatay howay accident kar baithay (kissi bhi wajah say, apni adam mahaarat, apni ghalati yaa doosroun ki ghalati say) to iss say yeh "nateejah" nikaalna durust nahi k car ki sawaari hi ghalat hai aur maiN kabhi car bus maiN nahi baiThouNga.
yehi haal shadi ka hai. kissi bhi shadi ki "nakaami" ki kai reasons hosakti haiN, apni ghalati, spouse ki ghalati yaa haalaat o waaqe'aat ki kharabi. lekin iss ka matlab yeh nahi hai k insaan aik ghalat tajarbah k sabab shadi hi say nafrat karnay lagay.
naam say ap muslim lagti haiN to apko nikaah k baray maiN quran o hadees ka hukm bhi maloom hoga k iss par kis qadar zor dia gaya hai. nikaah ko nisf imaan kaha gaya hai. yani shadi shudah ka nisf imaan to shadi kartay hi mokammal hojata hai. baqyah nisf k liyeh ossay mehnat karni paRti hai
hamari dunyaa bilkhasoos pakistani society aik male oriented hai. yahaaN koi aurat bahoot asaani say tanhaa zindagi nahi gozaar sakti...parents sada nahi rahtay, bahan bhai apnay apnay gharouN maiN masroof hojatay haiN. khatoon khaha ketni hi taaleem yaaftah aur bar saray roz.gara kiyoun nah ho... ossay qadam qadam par mardoun ki shelter ki zaroorat paRti hai... yeh shelter aik husband hi faraham karsakta hai, khaah woh kaisaa hi kiyoun nah ho... bilkul aisya hi jaisay har fard ko rahnay k liyeh aik "ghar" darkaar hota hai, khaah yeh ghar mahal ho yaa kachi jhoNpRi. koi yeh nahi kah sakta k agar meray pass pakka makaan nahi to maiN jhoNpRi maiN kiyoun rahouN?
aurat ki zindagi k 3 stages hotay haiN. aik shadi say qabal maaN baap ka ghar...doosra shadi k baad bachouN k baRay honay tak ka kaThan aur mushkil tareen waqt... aur aakhir maiN odheR omri...jab jism o jaan maiN koi taqat nah rahay, koi amdan nah ho, husn aur beauty bhi khatam hochuki ho... iss teesray stage maiN aurat ka moral support oss jaisaa hi oska husband aur deger support k liyeh oskay bachay hotay haiN...
zara sochaiN k jawani aur qabl az retirement ka yeh daur husband k beghair kaisay guzrega. qadam qadam par mardouN ki bhooki nazrouN say kaisay bacha jayega. aur aphir apni bhook ka kia kia jayega? aur kissi tarah yeh arsah guzar bhi jaa.ay to after retirement tanhaa zindagi to azaab hogi
kia apka koi kid hai, jo apkay pass ho? kia ap isswaqt apnay maikay maiN haiN? ya alag? apni baqyah future ki zindagi ko abhi say imagine karain k kaisay guzaarni hai... aur phir faislah karaiN k next shadi karni chhaiyeh ya nahi. Allah apko dursut faislah karnay ki taufeeq day. ameen mera zaati mashwarah to yeh hoga k agar koi monaasib rishtah mil jaa.ay to as soon as possible fauran shadi kar laiN. Allah behtar karega.
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maham shah |
Group: Members Joined: 02nd Mar, 2012 Topic: 4 Post: 49 Age:
27
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| Posted on:14th May 2012, 3:14pm |
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re: myrizvi ap ne jo jo batain likhi hain bdkismati se wo sb such hain... bohat kuch main face kar chuki hu aur bohat ziada face karna baki hai shayed... khandan ki chubti nazrain, cousins ki raghbat dyti nigahain, bhabion ke tanay,, maa ka kurdhna, abu ka udas rehna etc etc, par abhi main toti nahi hon na he main ne haar mani hai. main abhi tk qaaim hon divorce k faislay pe... meri aur uski mental compatibility nahi thi, bohat kuch aur bhi hai jo is faislay ka sabab bna...
ap ne jo kaha k aik aurat ko mard ke tahafuz ki zarort parti hai ye baat bilkul theek hai.
mera koi bacha nahi hai , us ne honay bhi nahi diye meri koshish k bawjud. main is waqt apne maikay main hon. main ne apne future ka abhi itna he socha hai k alag ghar lay lu apne parents k sath rahon, aur koi baby adopt kar lu. next shadi main nahi karna chahti, mere dil main dar baith gya hai. main tafseel se apna masla aj nai bayan nahi kar skti
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myrizvi |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 107 Post: 5686 Age:
53
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| Posted on:15th May 2012, 1:58am |
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maham shah apka mazeed tafseelat say agaah karnay ka shokarya...abhi tak divorce k faislay par qaim houN ka kia matlab... divorce hogaya hai yaa nahi... agar hogaya hai aur ap apnay sabeqah husband say dobarah rishtah istawar nahi karna chaahti to yeh apka HAQQ hai. koi apko iss haqq say nahi rok sakta.
yaad rakhiyeh kissi shauher ya kissi biwi ka apni zaat maiN acha ya boraa hona aur baat hai aur aik doosray k liyeh suitable /compatible hona doosri baat. ap dauray resaalat k behtareen logouN sahabah aur sahabiyaat RA ki misala lijyeh . yeh sab log behtraeen log thay...lekin iskay bawajood inkay darmayaan divorce hona aik "mamool" ki bata thi. onhainas wife or husband aik doosray say "shikayat" hoti thi aur woh aik doosray ko talaaq dia /lia kartay thay... kiyouNkay yeh log baham compatible nahi hotay thya... aur yeh talaq shodah mard aur khawateen jab kisi doosray say shadi kartay thay to khush o khurram rahaa kartay thay....
ap yeh "analyses" kar laiN k apka zindagi k aakheri stage (boRhapay) tak akela rahna asaan hoga yaa shadi karkay rahna asaan hoga.... wazah rahay k zindagi naam hi dokh+sokh k majmoo.ay ka hai... ap akeli rahaiN yaa shadi shodah zindagi gozaaraiN...pareeshaniyaaN aur masaial donouN soortouN maiN hongay...farq sirf yeh hoga k aik tareeqah ABNORMAL hai aur doosra NORMAL AUR NATURAL hai. married life aik natural life hai khaah iss main ketni hi mushkilaat kiyoun nahouN.
yeh zindagi ham muslims k liyeh aik test hai. ham par jo bhi moshkilaat, pareeshani, beemari, dokh etc aatay hain woh min jaanib Allah haiN...hamain in par sabar karna chaahiyeh aur right /natural /islamic way par chaltay rahna chahiyeh. islamic teaching yehi hai k baaligh honay k baad hamaiN shadi karleni chahiyeh aur kissi aik tajarbay ki naakami say ayandah shadi ka dar band nahi karna chahaiyeh.
Allah apko durust faislah karnay ki himmat day aur koi monaasib rishtah ataa karay aameen
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maham shah |
Group: Members Joined: 02nd Mar, 2012 Topic: 4 Post: 49 Age:
27
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| Posted on:15th May 2012, 12:38pm |
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divorce issue - ap ki qeemati aur mukhlis raaye ki main qadr karti hon. yakinan ap ne dunia muj se ziada dekhi hui hai. par ap ye bhi to dekhain zra, mazeed dhokay aur dukh uthanay se behtar yehi hai ke tanha raha jaye...married life natural aur normal hoti hai theek kaha ap ne... mgr sbki married life normal nahi hoti.....misunderstanding, maslay , gilay shikway aur larai jhagray to hr rishtay aur hr hr ghar main ho ho jatay hain ...asal baat to ye hai ke un issues ko is tarha solve kia jaye ke kisi bhi fard ke haqoq aur faraiz mutasir na hon.. mgr mehz aurat honay ki waja mujy he compromise ka kaha gaya .. aur 3 saal main ne ye kia bhi. jis din us ne mere kirdar ko nishana bnaya usi din se main ne divorce ka mutalba shoro kar dia.. aik aurat jisay uska shohar bdkirdar aur bura kahay aur next 2 hours k bd uski pakezgi ki kasmain bhi khaye ye keh ke main ne ghusay main kaha tha. aur next day phir yehi tamasha ho aur phir roz he honay lgay to aik shareef aurat kb tk compromise karay... talaq mangna mera haq hai .. aur us ne abhi tk mujy talaq nahi di. different batain keh raha hai
- main divorce nahi du ga tum court main ja ke lay lo
- tum dusri shadi karna chaho to karlo mgr main divorce nahi du ga
- chalo main divorce day dyta hon mgr 25 November ko (wedding date) ko du ga. tb tk tum a ke mere sath raho
- hotel main milo tmhain divorce da du mgr raat tmhain mere sath guzarni hogi.
ye sb batain sun ke main ne family ke moaziz afrad ko bulaya aur unk samnay apna masla rakh dia. ab wo isi baat pe mana hai k main divorce 25 November 2012 ko du ga. ab ap he batayen itne talkh tajrbay k baad kon himat karay dusri shadi ki. filhaal tawjo career bananay main lgai hai next years ka kia pata zindgi itna sath dyti bhi hai ya nahi |
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myrizvi |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 107 Post: 5686 Age:
53
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| Posted on:15th May 2012, 11:24pm |
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apka real maslah 1. abhi apka real maslah "doosri shadi" nahi balkay maujoodah rishtah ko bar.qarar rakhna yaa issay khatam karna hai.
2. aap nay husband ki naaqabilay bar.daasht harkatouN ki wajah say oss say talaq ka motalebah kia hai, jissay woh mokhtalif bahaanouN sya Taal raha hai
3. ap ye bhi chaahtii haiN k iss divorce k baad doosri shadi nah karaiN.
4. apkay koi bacha bhi nahi hai
5. ap bar saray rozgaar bhi haiN...mo'aashi taur par kissi ki mohtaaj bhi nahi
in saaray awaamil ki raushni maiN agar ap ham say mashwarah maanagaiN (issi gharz say to apnay yahaaN post kia hai k log apko mashwarah daiN) to hamara mashwarah yeh hoga k aap filwaqt:
A- apnay husband ka koi motaalebah nah maanaiN...nah hi oss say milaiN
B- ap khodd bhi divorce k motaalebah par koi zor nah daiN, nah hi apni taraf say koi contact karaiN
C- kuch arsah ap donouN aik doosray say 'isolate' ho kar rahaiN... sab kuch Allah par choR daiN...iss dauran Allah say dua karaiN k woh apkay haq maiN jo behtar ho, wohi karay... jab ham kissi issue ko khood handle karnay /solve karnay say qaasir hojatay haiN...to hamaiN chaahiyeh k sab kuch Allah par choR daiN. insha Allah woh iska behtareen hal nikalaega
aur haaN apnay khair khaahouN /bozorgouN k mashwaray ko kabhi nah TaalaiN. doosrouN ki ghaltiyouN ko maaf karna seekhaiN taakay Allah bhi apko rozay hashar maaf karay... ham sab Allah k gonaah.gaar haiN. ham sab Allah say apnay gonaahouN ki maafi chaahtay haiN...lehaza hamaiN bhi doosrouN ko maaf karneke baray maiN zaroor sochna chaahiyeh
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Diplomate |
Group: Members Joined: 18th Oct, 2009 Topic: 49 Post: 3183 Age:
35
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| Posted on:15th May 2012, 11:52pm |
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good reply by wadda praa g very nice ...:) |
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maham shah |
Group: Members Joined: 02nd Mar, 2012 Topic: 4 Post: 49 Age:
27
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| Posted on:16th May 2012, 3:05pm |
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isolation Ap ne bilkul theek mashwaray diye hain. main guzashta 1 saal se apne parents k ghar hon. aur main ne koi contact nahi kia apne husaband se. talak bhi main ne apne walidain aur usk walidain se ke through pehli bar mangi thi. us waqt phr us ne khud contact kia muj se meri bhabhi ke through aur wo sb above mention baatain kahien jinko mannany se main ne sakhati se inkar kar dia. phr us ne muj pe tezaab phenknay ki dhamki di aur koshish bhi ki. ALLAH ka bohat karm aur shukar hua k main mehfooz rahi. aur wo hamesha mujy dhamkanay k liye he fone karta tha jis wja se main ne sim 4 bar change ki. aur ab to 6 mah se koi contact nai kar ska wo mera number na honay ki wja se. main uskay sab muzalim, dukh, maaf kar don gi bs wo mujy talak dy day. college main job main ne apne maikay a ke apne walid ke mashwaray pe ki. shoro k 2 mah to main bohat disheart thi merAY Walidain ne he mujy sambhala aur himat di. mera ilaj karwaya,,, main bs divorce he chahti hu sirf divorce. main us ke pas wapis nai jana chahti. meri mental stability disturb ho jati hai uske sath janay ya rehnay ka mashwara sun kr he....... ap sb se request hai ke plzzzz mujy usk pas janay ka mashwara nahi dain main bohat buray haalat face kar ke ab stable hui hu... @myrizvi ap ne bohat achay aur mukhlisana mashwaray diye hain, mujy ehtraam hai apki raaye aur mashwaron ka. INSHALLAH main bohat jald apni married life ki wo tafseel bhi ap se share karon gi jo main ne abhi tak apne parents, friends aur susralion se nahi share ki (reasons for divorce). mere dil pe behad bojh bna hua hai iska. |
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myrizvi |
Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 107 Post: 5686 Age:
53
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| Posted on:17th May 2012, 12:31am |
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dil ka bojh halka kar laiN jab bhi fursat milay yahaan apnay dil ka bojh halka karlaiN. ham sab yahaan apki baat ko sonnay aur apni roy denay k liyeh haazir haiN. Allah say dua hai k wh apko zehni sakoon ataa far,maa.ay aameen
bus apni masroofiaat ko positive simat lay jayaiN. talkh yaadoun ko yaas kartay rahnay ki bajaa.ay achi achi books parhaiN, halki pholki movies dekhaiN. college maiN lectures say hatkar bh deger activities main hissah laiN. saathi asaatzah say gup shup karaiN, onki taqreebaat maiN shareek houN...agar shauq ho to kitchen fgardening karaiN, phool ogayaiN...gharzekay jo hobbies bhi pasand ho, ossay acyively agay baRhayain...insha Allah apkay dokh kam balkay khatam hojayengay.
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