Feeling shattered (become habitual of going to prostitutes)
I am a silent reader of this forum for last couple of years. This the very first time am writing here my problem.
I am working in Dubai for last 3 years. I am pretty much satisfied with my job & the incentive that I am taking from here. My family is in Karachi. Here i am living with my friends. i have a girl friend here she is also from Karachi. she said she love me but i never say to her.& yes we were in relationship so we had a sex once or twice a week. Problem is that two weeks before we had a small argument that result in to big problem now. from that day we are not contacting each other.
Igive Damn to her when she said we are over with our relationship. I was quite normal I said if she don't want to apologize with me why should I do. Problem is that I was missing sex more than her because i was use to it.
I have a friends here belong to some business class that you called them also ( AYASH TYPE) they are hiring a prostitute of different nationalities for night. They offered me one day but I said no am not interested in it.
Day passed and one day I was damn frustrated I go with them & yes the girls was beautiful & expensive too I forget everything when I was with them. After done with that I feel so ashamed I never drink Alcohol in my life & I will never do that but my friends are use to it.
For that day it become my habit now 3 to 4 time I go with my friends & I wasted a huge amount on them. I am earning a lot here but this is completely waste of money. In one night am spending a amount which is equal to Basic salary here for many people. Now I am feeling shattered myself.
You people give me a suggestion about marriage. so I already tried this. I am engaged with my cousin she is studying now will take more 3 years to complete her Bachelors degree before that she is not ready for marriage.
Any of you have some decent suggestion you are most welcome to reply. ( Specially Bushra I read your reply on different posts. I appreciate the way you are helping people here)
MOD EDIT: Edited title to be more descriptive of content.
Asslam o alikum. Yah bht ache aor khushaind baat ha k aap ko es mamaly main koi mashvoraa chahye. aor niat he phla step ha.
Transgressors: Allah aor apny khilaf transgression ha yah, aor rasool saww k khilaf. ku k Allah ny kaha ha. Do not come (even) near to adultery, for it is a shameful (deed) and an
evil, opening the road to other evils� (Surah al-Isra, 32). Aor be
bht jago py Allah ny Bht skaht azaab ki waheed sunie ha. siway es k,k
Mafi mango, Allah in tamam gunaho k achy amaal main badal ly.
Hadees:
Jub kse qoom main by haye aam ho jay to, Allah os qoom sy barish rook
lyta ha. Sirf janwaro k liay barish hote ha k wo mar na jayn. Aor, Allah un main aise aise bemarion nazil krta ha k un k baap dada ny be aise bemarin nhn daikhe huge.
Jub Allah pull siraat bechay ga:
Tb loag andhairy main hu gy, uny roshni mily ge. Allah kasam othay ga
"mjy mere izat ki kasam ha aaj wo loag es pull par sy nhn guzar payn
gay, jino ny khud sy bagawat ki, ya Allah k khilaf baghawat ki ya logo k
khilaf. Aor jub wo pull par sy guzarny lagyn gy to un ki light dim ho
jay ge, momino sy kahyn gy k ruk jao. Magar, un sy kaha jay ga, jao apny
light dunia main tilash kro. Aor phir dweer bna di jay ge, jis main
gate hoga, behari azaab andar, maza: adhe hadees ha, asal main yah quran
ki ayat ke tafseer ha.
Roz e mashar: Zina krny valo k organs,
penis, vagina, anus, testicles, un k mun par lagy hu gy aor, un main sy
blood, pee, poo and pus nikal raha hoga. Aor har koi pehchan ly ga k ya
zani ha, ya zania ha.
Zani ki dua qabool nhn hote:
Hadees: "raat main aik pehar ata ha
jub Allah nichly asman py ata ha aor os waqt har kse ki dua qabool ki
jate ha, siway zina kaar k".
Gunah ko chota na sumjho:
aik story: jub mere dadi ka aik
rishta dar marny laga to cheek raha tha, k mery opar sy, chohy (mice)
hatao, hala k naza k waqt, os k opar koun sy chohy thay, Lakin, Os ki bv
ko pta tha, os ny kaha k koi chohy nhn hai. asal main es ny choho k
sath zulm kia tha, un ko aik bartan main daal k mara tha, opar sy bnd kr
k. TO aap ka kya khayal ha zina ki saza na hoge?
Hadees:
"roz e mashar sub loag nagny hu gy, siway Hazrat ibrahim a.s k, Aor,
loag aik dosry sy bagain gy". Surah abassa watalwalah. To zara socho, maa, behn, bv, bahia, pora khandan, aap ko pehchan ly ga k yah kya krta tha, aaj to chup chup k krty ho?
Hadees+Surah
haqa: " Allah firshto sy kahy ga, k orto ko pukr k balo sy zameen py
patko, "Patko, lipato, maro",. wo kahyn gy rahm rahm, firshta kahyn ga,
Kaisa rahm? rahman ny rahm nhn kia tm par to? Mardo ko be bazao, tango sy pukar kr. In main jo hu gy uny, zina, by hayie ki saz hoge.
Gunaho ki mafi:
surah furqan last verses: Jo koi zina kry ga,
qatal kry ga, os k liay sakht azaab ha. magar jo, toba kry, aor naik
kaam kry, to Allah os k sary bury amaal naikiom main badal dy ga.
Dost koun ha: hadees: Dost wo ha, 1: jis ko daikh k khuda yaad ay. 2: jis ko daikh k accountability ka ahsaas ho. 3: aor jis ko daikh k (i think Achayie ka dil kry). mustanad hadees ha.
Sucha muslim koun ha?
Agar aap k garh ka koi aap ko call kry k garh ao fala foat ho gyia ha
to aap kya kro gy? ao gy na? rooyo, gy na? To, Allah ka mamly main aisa
ku nhn ha. jub k Allah to eternal azaab ya mazy ki baat krta ha? Bl k yah emaan ki kamzori ha, Jub emman hoga to actions sy pta lagy ga.
Medical nuqsanat:
jadeed tahqeeq sy yah bat sabit howe ha k
zina krny valo ko shadi k baad maza nhn ata. jub k dosro ko bht maza ata
ha. Bht ache life jate ha. Aor depress be nhn hoty.
2:
bemarian: aids, and bht se by shumar bemarin lagte hain. itne khaty naak
k aik be lag gye to ilaj aksar ka na mumkin he hote ha. Aik aids
valy ko tv main daikha tha, os ki maa os k pass na ati the, hala k aids
choot nhn ha. magar, kuty ki tarha dour sy roti di jate the.
Paso ka zaya: Ap achy ameer khandan sy lagty ho, jo itna pasia zaya krty ho. Bhai,
agar, garh valo ko nhn chhye. to mushvara du ga k aap kase, gareeb ka
garh ka kharcha otha dyn, loag pakistan main mar rahy hain gurbat sy.
Larkian jaiz ki khatar shadi nhn kr paa rahe hain, Kase ki pharie ka
kharacha otha lo, kse gareeb ki shadi krwa do. etc. Allah be khush hoga.
Hadees: "Allah says, give me, I'll give you".
Marriage:
Larki deen daar ha? to he krna, ya mera mashvora ha. Agar deen daar
hoge to aap par agar mesabaaton k pahar be too jayn gy to ap ka wahid
shahara hoge wo. Allah k rasool saww ki hadees ha k, "Larki main shadi k liay laog 4 chezain dikaty hain, 1: deen, 2: lineage. 3: beauty, 4 wealth, aor tm deen ko he daikhna". ache khobsurat ho to plus point ha yah aap k liay. Warna,
deen is most imprtant, es ka 1 number ha, es k muqably main sub ki
value 0 ha, to, Chun lo. deen nikala, you got 000, enjoy.
Study:
Ap ny os ki kitabain phaar dyne hain? nhn na? par ly wo. Ap k garh aa
kr he. Kuch nhn hota ha. aap baat kro un sy. Kase khaty main lagty hain
to theak ha. warna, jany he do bhai. aisy waqt main aap ko bv ki zurorat
ha, to wo ha k study main lage ha.
Aor, aap zina bilkal be na
kro. aor dosto ko be es mamly sy doru rakhny ki try kro. namaz parho.
quran par lia kro. aor, kse aor tarha ki enjoyment talash kro. Noor
clinci, be acha ha, time pass k liay. logo ko mashovoy be do. aor time
be nikal jay ga aap ka es tarha.
Rahe wo dost:
Wo zina kaar ha, aap toba kr lo. Aor, os sy shadi to aap ny krne na
hoge? I think na he kro to acha ha. AOr, apne czn sy he kro. Allah behtr
kry ga aap ki life. Aor, aub second step ha, toba krna. hum aap k liay
duae khari krty han.
Jo mard prostitutes ke paas jatay hein wo hamesha guilty feel kartay hein. Prostitute ko jo bhi mehsus ho unke gahak apni izzat-e-nafs par chot mehsus kartay hein, wo ye ke ham itnay gay guzray hein ke jisim ki talab ki khatir kiray ki vagina/anus/mouth ke chakkar mein aa gay. Apni izzat kharab karwanay ka paisa bhi dia?
Wese to jo aap pehlay kar rahay thay yaani girlfriend se sex, wo bhi ghalat tha. Aur gunah-e-kabeera tha. Magar girlfriend ke saath aik level of attachment hota hai. Prostitute ke saath to wo bhi nahen hota. Aapki harkaton ko justify nahen kia balke aapko bataya hai ke girlfriend se sex ke baad aapki nafsiyati haalat behtar kyun thee aur prostitute ke saath sex kar ke nafisyati haalat itni behtar kyun nahen thee.
Ab jis bechari ke saath aapki mangni hui hai usko used larka milega. Jisko najane kon kon si bemarian lag gai hongi.
------------------------
Mashwara to ye hai ke aap wapas apne mulk ajaen. Rizq jo likha hai mil kar rahega. Aik niwala kam nahen - aik niwala ziada nahen. Lekin maan baap ka danda sar par hoga to gunah se bachay rahenge.
Quran mein aayat hai: zani zania ke lye hai, zania zani ke lye. Ye ayat koi pesheen-goi nahen hai. Kyunke Islam pesheen-goi ka mazhab nahen. Balke instructions ka mazhab hai. Is ayat mein islamic empire ke administrator ko hukum de dia gya hai ... ke wo register bana kar rakhay jo zani hai ainda uska zania se he nikah ho.
Yaani jo shadi shuda zina kare, usko sangsaar. Aur jo ghair shadi-shuda zina kare, usko 100 koray aur uskay baad bhi uski shadi kabhi paakbaaz se nahen ho sakti. Balke zani mard ki shadi zania aurat se he hogi. Aur zania aurat ki shadi zani mard se he hogi. Aur islamic state ka kaam hai ke isko yaqeeni banay.
Bhut se batain aap ne khe jis ke me qadar krta ho. Aur sab kuch jo aap ne kha wo bhe me phele se janta tha. Even with refrence of Quran & Ahadis.
Aap ne baat kre medical problem ke wo Allah ka sukar ha sab positive ha q ka me yha check up krwata rehta ho. I always take care of my health. But phr bhe guilty to me ho.
Home country ka aap ne kha wo mera dil nhe krta aab. Bcz I feel my carrier & future very safe & successful here.
Trust me i belong to very conservative & religious family. But i don't know i just don't know from where this habit came from. I am trying to leave this Asap.
i will not marry my czn now i decided. She said wait for me till my graduation. I said why should i wait tm shadi ka baad bhe parh skte ho. My mom is forcing me to not cancel this proposal. But i decided to cancel.
Anyways thanks Ms bushra for your reply.
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Feeling shattered (become habitual of going to prostitutes)
Ms Bushra has now seen this post
